McGowan never wanted to be actress
Rose McGowan has admitted that she never wanted to be an actress and is much happier in her new role as a director.
The Charmed star has directed short film Dawn for Sundance and told Collider it was a job she felt much more comfortable with.
She said: "The funny thing is that I've been directing behind the scenes for a long time. I've directed other actors through directors that didn't know how to direct them. I've basically been trying to control things, my own way, from behind the scenes.
"The thing is, I was never trying to be an actress. I didn't come here for that. It was totally accidental, and I never really found a huge passion for it.
"I love it. There are moments when you act that you actually disappear from your body, and that's amazing. That's better than any drug, I would imagine. People take drugs to disappear from themselves, and that's what it feels like when you hit that moment."
She continued: "But all the c*** and all the slings and arrows that go with it, frankly, just doesn't interest me. I'm better than that. I'm a better human, and I don't deserve a lot of the s*** that goes along with it, so I choose not to do it.
"I stayed in it for so long because I was like, 'It's everybody's dream.' But it's not my dream, and that's OK. It doesn't mean that I don't actually really enjoy it. I enjoy it a lot more, now that I've had that epiphany and I've realised that I don't have to do this. It's been incredibly freeing."
Rose explained: "With directing, I felt like I was wearing pants that fit me, for the first time. Sundance is the only thing that you can't campaign for. You can campaign to be in the Golden Globes. You can campaign to get into the Oscars. You can't campaign for Sundance. And your name doesn't help you. It works against you."
The Grindhouse actress said that getting to direct a film shown at Sundance was the best thing that she had achieved.
She said: "It's the high point of my career because it's the career that I chose. When acting happened to me, I was grateful. It was one of those things that is this mass societal dream, so I assumed that I must want it to. And it appeared, so I thought it must be what was meant to happen. So, you just get stuck in this thing.
"But, I'm a free human being and I can do whatever the f*** I want. Kick a**! How fun! What a great life!"
She added: "I was never nervous directing. Not once. I'm more nervous acting. I'm far more nervous on set, before I say my lines, than I ever have been, as a director."