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Party over for Kirsty Gallacher as her Strictly hopes Fester

By Billy Weir

Published 02/11/2015

Kirsty Gallacher (centre) was axed by the ghoulish judges
Kirsty Gallacher (centre) was axed by the ghoulish judges

Halloween and Strictly Come Dancing - if you ever wanted two essential ingredients for a Saturday night party then you have it, but when the party is Sinn Fein then that's a different matter.

The clues were there, I suppose, for not only did we have a McGuiness, there was a whole Addams Family as the judges got a full horror makeover with our gruesome foursome - Bruno Tonioli, Craig Revel-Horwood, Len Goodman and Darcey Bussell - coming as Pugsley, Gomez, Uncle Fester and a strangely alluring Morticia - think Arlene Foster but not as scary.

But it was when Jay McGuiness turned up as Gerry Adams that more alarm bells were ringing, with poor unsuspecting Little Red Riding Hood blissfully unaware the lupines hadn't gone away you know.

He was supposedly the big bad wolf and proceeded to sweep the lady in red along in a graceful American Smooth number that had the punters on their tootsies and roaring more than the final night of the Ard Fheis.

It earned him 34 points and looked destined for at least a share of power with Call The Midwife star Helen George whose samba dressed as a mummy started with her clambering out of a sarcophagus.

Strangely just before she and partner took to the stage there had been a weird, muffled knocking sound that no one could put their finger on but then they realised that's where the SDLP and DUP have put Alasdair McDonnell and Sammy Wilson until the talks are over.

There were calls galore for a recount and a change in the voting system, no, Jim Allister hadn't joined in, as Countryfile's Anita Rani's waltz fell foul of Horwood who said "it lacked grace, I like the storytelling, it needs to be more lyrical". Listen and learn, Jim, listen and learn.

However, there was to be no power-sharing, as Georgia May Foote tangoed her way to the top with an homage to something that was big in the Eighties but then seemed to disappear. No, not the UUP, it was Ghostbusters, and who knows, her rise to the top could mirror that of Mike Nesbitt. Who you gonna call, probably not Reg Empey.

But after a mesmeric rise it finally started to spiral downwards for the women's coalition, with Kirsty Gallacher, Carol Kirkwood, Jamelia and Katie Durham all in the lower reaches.

And when the great unwashed went to the hustings their X was put beside Sky Sports News presenter Gallacher and Loose Woman star Jamelia, with all the judges coming down on the side of the former pop songstress.

Only time will tell whether they are on the wrong side of history, meanwhile, I'm off to Stormont in a sequinned tutu to gauge how they're getting on.

Belfast Telegraph

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