Belfast Telegraph

Saturday 31 January 2015

DVD: The Expendables (15)

Handled right, Sly Stallone's testosterone-fuelled hokum could have been fun. But it's not. Stallone mostly plays the action straight, and it's aimed at 12-year-old boys.

Sly and his grunts (Jason Statham, Jet Li etc) are hellbent on overthrowing a South American dictator. Typical lines here include "bullets are faster than blades". Sly, as usual, grunts incoherently, and the scene between Stallone and Mickey Rourke, slurring furiously, is inpenetrable. However, the usually wooden Statham is quite good, and it's nice to see Charisma Carpenter from Buffy the Vampire Slayer get a part. Not silly enough, and the scene between Arnie, Willis and Sly isn't as droll as it thinks it is.

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Aquarius:

This is a great time to go shopping. You'll find some clothes, furniture or artwork that seems tailor made to your taste. Don't worry about spending more money than usual. The things you buy will give you years of pleasure. If you're looking for work, volunteer at a charitable organisation that is close to your heart. This will lead to a paying position that is emotionally fulfilling. You're tired of dead end jobs that leave you cold. It's time to move in a more rewarding direction.More