Belfast Telegraph

Thursday 23 October 2014

Man uses wife as shark bait - dreadful headlines

Here's a selection of some of the strangest headlines to adorn the pages of newpapers around the world

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If you can add to the list below or send us a clipping - then we want to hear from you.



Suicide to go commercial, says BBC head - The Daily Telegraph



2 Convicts Evade Noose: Jury Hung - US newspaper



Shell found on beach - Evening Argus



Slim-fad girl, 17, vanishes - The Sun



Abattoir staff will be halved - Chester Mail

Suicide to go commercial, says BBC head - The Daily Telegraph



Magistrates act to keep theatres open - The Evening Citizen



Crash courses for private pilots - The Daily Telegraph



Gas rig men grilled by villagers - The Oxford Times



No water so firemen improvised - Liverpool Daily Post



Filming in cemetery angers residents - The Evening Standard



New York ban on boxing after death - The Times





Some other headlines from around the world......

  • Grandmother of eight makes hole in one
  • Deaf mute gets new hearing in killing
  • Quarter of a million Chinese live on water


  • Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers
  • House passes gas tax onto senate
  • Stiff opposition expected to casketless funeral plan
  • Two convicts evade noose, jury hung
  • Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted
  • Milk drinkers are turning to powder
  • NJ judge to rule on nude beach
  • Farmer bill dies in house
  • Iraqi head seeks arms
  • Panda mating fails - veterinarian takes over
  • Organ festival ends in smashing climax
  • Child''s stool great for use in garden
  • Soviet virgin lands short of goal again
  • Man uses wife as shark bait


Bad Grammar...

  • Eye drops off shelf
  • Squad helps dog bite victim
  • Dealers will hear car talk at noon
  • Enraged cow injures farmer with ax
  • Lawmen from Mexico barbecue guests
  • Miners refuse to work after death
  • Two Soviet ships collide - one dies
  • Two sisters reunite after eighteen years at checkout counter


Opposite Meaning...

  • Never withhold herpes from loved one
  • Nicaragua sets goal to wipe out literacy
  • Drunk drivers paid $1,000 in 1984
  • Autos killing 110 a day, let''s resolve to do better

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Your Horoscopes by Russell Grant

Scorpio:

It's important to treat yourself well. Constantly deferring to others will deprive you of the finer things in life. Carve time out of your busy schedule to pamper yourself. Taking a nap, solitary walk or hot bath will revive your spirits. Get into the habit of spending more money on creature comforts. Treat such as gourmet food, beautiful clothes and intriguing books are investments in your happiness. Others may object at being put farther down on your list of priorities, but that's their problem.More