Sarah Harding has revealed it was her Girls Aloud bandmates who first spotted she needed help to sort out her drinking and said she cried "hysterically" as she headed to rehab.
Speaking for the first time about her stint in a US clinic, Sarah said her drinking went out of control as her relationship with ex-fiance Tom Crane disintegrated and she tried to "numb" the pain.
She told Hello! magazine: "The day I left for rehab, I was in such a mess. I've been told by those close to me that was when I hit my worst.
"I was crying hysterically. I felt ashamed, embarrassed, terrified - my emotions were all over the place."
The singer said she was ricocheting between emotional extremes as her wild living spiralled as a way to cope with being down.
The chart star - who scored hits such as Love Machine and Biology with the girl group - sought help for depression and alcohol abuse in October when her relationship with DJ Tom fell apart.
She said: "Our lives had started to go in different directions without us even realising and we'd become like passing ships.
"He had his career, I had mine, and somehow they didn't seem to marry up. As far as our future plans were concerned, I didn't see how it would work.
"I was so down but I just tried to keep busy and, to numb myself, I was drinking more. It was my way of escaping."
Harding said her "emotions were all over the place" adding: "One minute I was deliriously happy, to the point of hysteria, and totally in denial about my problems saying, 'I'm fine, I'm fine.' The next it hit me and when it did, it hit me hard. It's all about acceptance."