To paraphrase the old Kit-Kat ad, Jedward can’t sing, they can’t play and they look awful.
But they’ll go a long way.
Love or hate the extravagantly coiffured Dublin twins, you will struggle to ignore them.
From scoring a number one album in Ireland to their upcoming Celebrity Big Brother appearance and a rumoured ‘duet' with Steven Tyler of Aerosmith, 2011 is shaping up to be John and Edward Grimes’s year.
And who could begrudge them?
When I was 19, I was working in my uncle’s vacuum cleaner shop and drinking cider in the Holylands.
Jedward, meanwhile, arrived in Belfast last night fresh from a string of sold-out theatre dates across the country.
The boys were celebrating yesterday's UK release of their new CD, the aptly titled Victory.
The screaming had started outside the Waterfront by early afternoon (and possibly inside too, with staff screaming to get out), and it only got louder as show time approached.
And to be fair, the brothers’ Carnival Tour represents a step up in scale from last year’s jaunt.
It might not be the most original show in the world — Britney Spears and Take That both beat them to the circus theme — and their poor singing and lack of a live band continue to conspire against them, but the effervescent duo certainly gave the crowd their money’s worth.
The setlist boasted close to two-dozen songs, many of them covers, ranging from Lady Gaga to Blink-182. They even delivered an impromptu medley of Jingle Bells and Silent Night.
Wearing angel wings.
On Planet Jedward, seemingly anything goes.
Still, last night’s hyperactive mob of mostly pre-teens lapped it up.