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Caitlyn Jenner's sister was initially against transition

Published 22/07/2015

Caitlyn Jenner
Caitlyn Jenner

Caitlyn Jenner's mother is seen having a difficult time dealing with her transition in the first episode of her reality TV show I Am Cait.

The 65-year-old star was previously known as Bruce, but has transitioned into a woman. Her journey has been followed for a new eight-part reality TV show on E! called I Am Cait, and portions of the first episode - which will air later this month in the US - have now been released.

In one Caitlyn's sister Pam speaks of the star's struggle to accept her true self.

"He first confided in me 30 years ago, I thought it was something counselling would help him with and then a few years ago he spoke to me about authentic life," she said.

“He felt like he needed to follow through on his desires, go public and discuss the issue. Initially I discouraged him, I didn't know how it could work.”

The show follows Caitlyn as she picks her way through her new life, including meeting with her family members for the first time. These include his former stepdaughter Kim Kardashian and her husband Kanye West, with the rapper saying a simple, "What up?" to Caitlyn when they first come face to face.

Caitlyn's mother Esther found the change more of a struggle and repeatedly refers to her child as "he".

"It's going to be so difficult for me to think of you as she, and say Caitlyn when I want to speak with you, or call your attention, 'Hey Caitlyn' instead of, 'Hey Bruce,'" she explains.

"You look so much like someone in my family and I was trying to figure it out, it's not easy, it's not easy. But your values are always going to be the same, Bruce will still be there, you have the same soul, you have the same soul as you were born with.

“I love Bruce, it will never change. It's going to take some getting used to, I want to do what he wants.

“The problem before with you and I, I'm guessing this, is that you felt uncomfortable with me, we would see each other and it was like you wanted to get away."

Caitlyn explains she was isolating herself from everyone, not just her mother, because she couldn't cope with how different she felt. Insisting she is now "optimistic" about life, she is shown signing a birthday card to Esther as Caitlyn - marking the first time she had written her new name.

Although Esther is seen trying to understand the situation, she struggles as she had no idea what was going on with her for so many years.

"You never talked to me I never knew, I never guessed you had a problem, you hid it very well," she said.

"I have been preparing myself for this, it's overwhelming, I knew he was going to be dressed as a women, I think he is a very good looking woman, he is still Bruce to me.

"I love him so much, I always have, I always will. It' s a lot of getting used to, but I will, yes I will. I need to learn more."

In another touching scene, Caitlyn's 17-year-old daughter Kylie is seen meeting her for the first time. They initially saw each other over FaceTime when Kylie accidentally called her, but they meet up at Caitlyn's Malibu home. Kylie is seen running into her arms and calling her "pretty", with the pair then embarking on a pampering session, with Caitlyn joking it's much more fun than sitting around talking about sports like they used to.

Opening up about how unhappy she has been for much of her life, Caitlyn explained she had considered using a gun to end her life as it would mean taking away the pain and suffering she felt.

She is now determined to speak out about her struggle in the hope it will make people accept members of the transgender community.

© Cover Media

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