Calum Best: I need to 'get over' difficult relationship with my late father
Calum Best said he feels like he needs to "get over" his difficult relationship with his dad George Best, although he acknowledges that it was this that led him to a path of partying in his younger days.
Calum, who rose to fame for being the footballer's son before becoming a reality TV star and gossip column regular, said he struggled with the image of his father being lauded as an idol when he himself did not get to see that side of him.
George had a successful career as a footballer after being signed to Manchester United as a teenager, before becoming better known for his alcoholism and health issues before his death at 59 in 2005.
Calum lived in America with his mother Angie throughout his childhood before he moved to the UK in the hopes of forming a relationship with George.
Calum told therapist Mandy Saligari on Channel 5's In Therapy that he and George had a "tricky" relationship, that there was no depth to it and "no deep I love yous".
He recalled the time his father went into surgery for a life-saving liver transplant about five years after he moved to the UK.
Calum said: " He came to (after his operation) and I remember standing over him and he opened his eyes and he looked an absolute state.
"There was a real vulnerability to him, a genuine look in his eye that I felt I'd never had before. He looked at me and said, 'Calum, I'm really sorry, it's going to be different from now on.'
"All this reaching and hoping and praying for a bond, for some sort of relationship with my dad, in that moment I thought it could now be here."
They later went on a holiday that Calum thought would secure their father-son bond, but when George began drinking again he knew his chance was over.
"All the years of reaching and years of me packing up my shit from America, that was the moment, that moment in that hospital and that trip, that was the changing point that could have been, and it ended right there.
"I wanted to give up totally. From then onward it was back to drinking and he drank and drank and drank until it ended.
"I just remember leaving that trip so fucking confused and so upset and distraught, I just fucking snorted and drank and shagged my way through everything to try to feel some sort of depth."
Apologetically, Calum told Saligari that he feels he needs to "stop moaning about it".
He said: "Just after I told you that story I was like, get over it."
Calum said: "For as many years as I can remember I've had to agree to a figure that was held at this level, when really my relationship with (him) was shit.
"I've had to hear what a legend, what a thing (he was), when really inside I'm going, holy shit I didn't experience any of that."