Holden: BGT got me back on my feet
Amanda Holden has told how going back to work helped her after she nearly died in labour.
The Britain's Got Talent judge was in intensive care after giving birth to daughter Hollie in January 2012, just 13 months after she gave birth to a stillborn son, Theo.
Amanda, 42, who has a seven-year-old daughter, Lexi, with husband Chris Hughes, faced criticism from some mums for going back to work on the ITV show's judging panel so soon, but she told the Daily Mirror it helped her pick herself up.
"I was in intensive care for four days and almost died. I got myself home and I didn't want to think about dying any more," she was quoted as saying.
"One day Lexi came home from school and was appalled I was still in my pyjamas. I knew I had to pick myself up and pull myself out of it.
"My body was really swollen. I looked like a rugby player and she had seen me with tubes coming out of me, it was all really hideous.
"We protected her from most of the horrors of it. But the normality for her was to see me go back to work and I thought, 'I am going back'.
"There was one night I went back, and Chris and I were able to forget all the devastation, get on a train, have a quiet journey to Edinburgh, do the show and come home."
Amanda said she was asked to write her autobiography, entitled No Holding Back, for years but felt her early life was based on her first marriage to comedian Les Dennis and her affair with actor Neil Morrissey.
"I thought it was a shallow, awful part of my life, all played out publicly. Why bring out a book? Then subsequently my life changed. Loads of amazing things happened. I found Chris, I had my children," she said.