More drink, more holidays and kick up ass for politicians - May McFettridge bids to be Northern Ireland president
Barra who? Nolan would stir the pot, roll on 'May Day'
Eamonn Holmes has suggested Northern Ireland needs a president-like figure head, someone we can all get behind - and one potential candidate has set out her bid for the top job.
"Roll on May Day," says the legendary May McFettridge.
And the Belfast battleaxe is not pulling any punches. Serious manifesto pledges include decent pensions for women, better health care for the elderly, shops opening longer - to reduce unemployment and tap into the tourist trade - and easing of drinking laws.
"And on a bank holiday we all get a day off," she told the Belfast Telegraph in an exclusive interview pitching for the popular vote.
Broadcaster Holmes said the potential president should be above politics, someone we can all get behind, "Someone for high days and holidays".
But May says she won't take any nonsense from the politicos on the hill saying she'll get involved if needs be and deliver a much-needed "big kick up the backside".
"They need to respect each other," she said, "and keep talking, otherwise..."
But before she gets into the office proper, there is the little matter of getting elected in the first place. Since we unleashed our poll on who you think would make a good president, BBC weatherman Barra Best put his name forward - even though we omitted him from the poll.
"Barra who? Sure there would be more chance of George Best than Barra Best," said May.
"He brings nothing but rain anyway."
Currently in the poll, May is running just behind Dame Mary Peters - as many have done before.
"Mary would make a good president," May did concede, "she could be the first president and me the deputy president."
And on the other contenders?
"Nolan would enjoy getting his big spoon out to stir the pot up, Rory and Michael O'Neill would be good statesmen and Pam Ballentine would have us all riding horses. I once did panto with Julian when he was the baddie and sure he wouldn't harm a fly - he's not the worst and I'd be a good orange woman beside him.
"Vote for May, roll on May Day," she said just moments before jetting off on an 'important trade mission' to Lanzarote.
"To get the pimples off my back," she joked.
Belfast Telegraph Digital