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Nikki Reed: People can’t control you

Published 14/09/2015

Nikki Reed
Nikki Reed

Nikki Reed believes that empathy is a valuable tool for growth.

The 27-year-old star opened up about the issue of bullying in her new column for the US edition of Elle. The actress had previously asked readers to write in with their own thoughts and experiences and after an overwhelming response, Nikki shared her findings. “I found one unexpected common theme: control. When people feel out of control, it breeds insecurity, which can result in bullying,” she said. “Whether it's a lack of control over others or themselves, the need to bully is absolutely manifested by the power one feels when they can affect people's feelings. So, if there is one thing I want to leave you with as we continue on this journey of learning about human behaviour together, it is this: while people can absolutely affect your feelings, they cannot control them.”

Nikki added that once someone finds power in knowing that the person causing them problems cannot control their feelings, they can view the situation differently. But she also shared some tips that her fans had sent in for dealing with the situation.

“But the question remains, how do we find the good? How do we focus on the positive in an attempt to fuel those qualities?” she continued. “Many of you suggested confidence-building techniques, such as learning a skill, that can serve as a creative outlet for both the bully and the person being bullied.”

The star, who is married to Ian Somerhalder, thinks being creative can be beneficial to both parties and encourage a harmonious future for all involved.

“I was intrigued by this because it drew a parallel between both parties, which can encourage empathy, a tool that is very valuable for growth,” she added.

© Cover Media

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