Belfast Telegraph

Friday 26 December 2014

Tom Hardy: I'm terrified

Tom Hardy

Tom Hardy is worried he could "f**k" up his career at any moment.

The actor checked into rehab for alcohol and drug addictions in 2003 and has been clean ever since.

His successful career has included roles in movie hits such as Inception and The Dark Knight Rises and worrying about relapse keeps him on his toes.

“I’m just a frightened bloke. Everything scares me. Not being in control, not knowing, anticipation, waiting for something to go wrong.

"Fear itself. I’m in a really good space today, but I can always find something to moan about, even sitting on a pedestal. It’s never that far away for me," he admitted to British newspaper The Mirror.

“Sometimes it’s like drinking the next beer, I will do the next film and the next, keep going, keep going... If I stop working they might take it away from me. People will say, ‘Tommy you’re doing well,’ and I say, ‘Am I?’ In my head I’m still the kid. Does that make sense?

“I love what I do, but it’s driven by a fear of not being able to do it. It’s the same with drinking – if I stop then who am I? What have I got?

"I have to watch that drive. It doesn’t matter how well I am doing, I’m only that far away from f**king it all up.”

The 36-year-old did something "heinous" while battling addiction, which acted as a wake-up call.

He's still well aware what drink could do to him.

“What I have is indiscriminate, like a bullet. If you are an alcoholic that is what you are," he explained.

“If I had four pints of lager and half a bottle of vodka I could turn this room into an absolute f**king nightmare in about three minutes. I could destroy everything in my life I have worked so hard for.”

The star confessed that alcohol became his "best friend" and that he even dabbled with heroin.

Now he's looking to the future with roles in Animal Rescue, Child 44 and Mad Max: Fury Road.

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It feels like friends are few and far between. If you're not getting the help you need, ask why. It may be because you have been so preoccupied with work. Skipping special occasions and failing to return phone calls causes resentment. You have to be more engaged to sustain loving bonds. Call someone you've missed. It may take a few tries, but it's worth the effort. Be forthright about why you have been out of touch. Communication is the cornerstone of every healthy relationship.More