We've come a long way since the Joy Of Sex videos. Now we're less concerned about 'doing it' as finding the time to do it at all.

With increasingly intensified lives being led by today's busy professionals it seems most of us haven't the time or inclination to think about the rumpy pumpy business of sex.

But fear not, whenever there's an opening in the publishing market there's always a glut of self-help manuals written by experts willing to fill it.

Now, thanks to an overload of recent literature on the subject, you can be debriefed in a whole new fashion.

Granted it's only reading, but you'll be better prepared to go for goal when you do actually find time to do the wild thing with your partner.

1. Shiver me timbers

Take it outdoors, advise several of the new manuals like Tracey Cox's Quickies and Dr Pam Spurr's Sensational Sex: The Revolutionary Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Fulfilment. Hey, if the good doctor says so . . .

Location isn't apparently just a mindful philosophy for the property market, it can also make a huge difference to your sex life, we're assured.

A drizzly wet Saturday frolicking on the grass in Belfast's Botanic Gardens doesn't have quite the same ring as your private island in the Caribbean, say, or P Diddy's luxury yacht far out to sea.

Still, Katie Hopkins (below), star of the recent Apprentice TV series, is all for the benefits of local farmland, even if peeping Toms are lurking.

2. Fone sex

Tracey Cox is not a woman shy about suggestion.

The author of Superflirt, Supersex and a Handy Deck of Cards with titillating tricks for those who've won first prize in bendy yoga class has graced the world with another title - Quickies.

Not surprisingly, this endorses the benefits of getting down to it anytime you've got a minute to spare.

The dirty phone call has morphed into an almost unrecognisable form - and one that's hard to understand - thanks to 'sxy txts' of which Cox is a fan.

Utilise it throughout the day, she recommends, so that by the time you reach home you're a quivering jelly of desire.

3. Coming at things from another angle ...

No, we're not talking chandeliers swinging or building a seat in the shower.

New York 'couples therapist' Esther Perel's Mating in Captivity encourages couples to remember that being in love taps into an elevated state.

Even if the fact that his breathing is bothering you or her picking her teeth after dinner makes you fit to choke her, you should pause and remember that "with you and through you I will become that which I long to be" .

If that's too hard to remember when he's failed to pack the dishwasher again, Barbara Carrellas' Urban Tantra suggests you could go looking for his Muladhara, a particularly vulnerable location between the anus and genitals.

4. Popping up problems

For the academically challenged, there's Rubess and Moerbeek's self-explanatory Pop-Up Book of Sex, a rather cute if slightly disturbing throwback to those books you enjoyed as children.

While Rubess and Moerbeek's pages will pop up on demand, things unfortunately aren't always so predictable in the bedroom.

5. No children allowed

Despite the fact that they're a direct result of 'doing it', children can be one of the largest hindrances to a happy sex life.

Perel highly recommends getting rid of them. Locking them under the stairs, leaving them out in the rain and pretending you've lost the key (which has somehow necessitated you running around the house naked) or shipping them off to boarding school are all possibilities if you really can't have someone look after them for a few hours.

Perel doesn't seem to take into account the fact that most harried mothers of young kids would probably like to curl up under the covers with a good book - rather than a husband – if they managed to eliminate the kids for a night.

6. Eyeing the Prize

Giving your partner the glad eye - or even the 'non-dominant' one - takes on a whole new meaning when you've read Urban Tantra.

Remember those suggestive eyelash sweeps you gave him during your courtship that now make him ask if your contact lenses are hurting you? Forget it.

Urban Tantra recommends you try to find his non-dominant eye, which is apparently the gateway to the soul. If you tap into that, you'll be on such a level of intimacy you can throw away all those other self-help books.

7. Shut up already

Though all agree that communicating honestly and openly is a key factor in managing a modern relationship, several of the books like Mating in Captivity, also recommend putting a sock in it now and then too.

Mostly it seems this is to compensate for the male brain's deficiency in the expression of honest and open communication, but also because women have a tendency to yammer on ceaselessly about 'feelings' until they've talked any semblance of desire out of their men.

8. Leave it to the stars

If you're really at a loss to connect, or a huge fan of astrology, you could pick up a copy of Sextrology: the Astrology of Sex and the Sexes.

This will apparently tell you how to have sex according to your star sign's own special needs and desires, which might eliminate the necessity of having all those pop-ups books handy.

Brace yourself for the devastating proposition, however, that your needs may turn out to be 'Libra' and your partners an incompatible 'Aries' despite the fact you've spent 30 years together and had six kids.

9. Age old remedies

For those blessed with a vivid imagination, a huge amount of time and very agile bodies, there's always the Kama Sutra, which has been doing the rounds for centuries.