What women want: to be married to a man called James

Monday, May 12, 2008

'My boyfriend's middle name is James'

Youth worker Mary Frances Loughran (23) is the newly crowned Belfast Rose of Tralee. She lives in north Belfast and is currently dating. She says:

L ooks are important, but they aren't the first thing that I would go for. A sense of humour is really important to me. I would really need to get on with the person and be able to have a laugh. I don't like guys that are too polished or into getting their fake tan done and eyebrows plucked. I like a bit of stubble, indie types with long hair.

Pride of appearance is important. But, I wouldn't want a guy to dress the way I want him to dress. I want him to dress for himself.

I've never really thought about men's names or what I would want a partner to be called, although I think that it does say a lot about the person. I don't think it should matter what it is and I don't think that I would be put off by a name. My boyfriend's middle name is actually James, which is a bit of a coincidence.

I think their salary does matter — you have to sensible about these things. If he's really passionate and driven about his career, then I think that would reflect his personality. I think it's as important as what he earns. I would want him to be happy with his career; something we could chat about and spend time discussing.

No matter what he does, love is love and his career shouldn't be the main focus. The qualities I look for in a man are modesty, humility, a sense of caring for other people and the community. The future does worry me. Some of my friends, who are much younger than me, have bought houses already and I do worry about things like that. I'm at the stage of my life where I have to start and focus on my goals. I finished my degree in community youth work last year and at the moment I'm trying to get a place in a drama school. I'd prefer to get my studies over with — before I start to think about settling down. I want to have everything covered first — my dream job and my own place."

'The name James sounds regal but I don't think it's important'

Kaz Lynas (24) works as an account executive at Propeller PR, Belfast. She is currently in a relationship. She says:

My favourite quote is 'Men are like fine wine, they all start out like grapes and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you would like to go to dinner with.'

Any good woman will have a man wrapped around her little finger so it doesn't really matter how much he earns or what his name is — she should still be able to get what she wants out of him.

Money definitely helps — it's always nice to be treated in life.

I've known a lot of people that have big high flying jobs and that's all very well ... as long as they enjoy their work.

But, if they are not happy in their career then they will only bring it home and it'll put a strain on things.

They'll come home to you at night and you'll only end up having to listen to them bitch on about how much they hate their job.

In the past, I always wanted to marry someone who was in the Italian Mafia — a tall, dark, swarthy type. I had this image of him handing me his credit cards so that I could go swanning off to Macy's shopping. But, the guy I'm going out with now is actually blond! The name James does sound very regal but, I don't think the name is important.

Having said that, I couldn't go out with anyone called Fergal — the name just reminds me of a big farmer. I don't want to be married young — I have a bit of wit. I think it's important to experience life first and to be happy in yourself first before you settle down. When I was younger, I did think that I would get married in my twenties. Now I think you have to ready for it. There needs to be a really strong bond there and you need to have a lot in common. Ultimately, he would need to make me laugh so that we can have a good time together. I think you can tell a lot about a man by the shoes he wears.

If he's wearing terribly tatty trainers and looks very scruffy ... well, I'm afraid that just wouldn't do at all.

And if he came out of the bedroom wearing those awful jeans that hang down around his knees, I'd just have to tell him to go right back inside, change into something decent, then I might talk to him!

More of our favourite James's

• Actor/model Jamie Dornan is a former student of Methodist College, Belfast. He rose to prominence while dating actress Keira Knightley. He has graced the cover of many a magazine and modelled for Calvin Klein, with Kate Moss and Levis. He has also been linked to Sienna Miller and former star of The OC Mischa Barton.

• Murphy's Law actor James Nesbitt has been married to wife Sonia for 14 years. They have two children Peggy (10) and Mary (6). His loyal wife resolutely stood by him amid tabloid claims of infidelity.

• Former soldier turned singer, James Blunt topped the charts with the song, You're Beautiful, from his multi-million selling first album Back To Bedlam. He has been linked to numerous high-profile celebs, including Czech model Petra Nemcova. They reportedly split up last summer.