Belfast Telegraph

Friday 19 September 2014

Are you dating too much?

We all love chocolate cake and sleeping in late, but if all you did was scoff giant chocolate creations and snooze until 1pm you’d soon get sick, bored and uninspired. The same principal should be applied to dating.

Too many dates will mean you stop engaging with anyone you meet up with and dating too much might mean you miss your Prince Charming or Miss Right. Here are five signs that you need to go on a dating detox.

Déjà vu

Imagine you are on a date and you sit down at a nice restaurant, pick up the menu and begin chatting away, asking all the right questions to this potential guy or girl. For some reason you can’t shake off the feeling that this all seems very familiar. You’ve eaten these foods before, you’ve heard these answers before. And then it hits you: you’ve already been on a date with this person.

If you have ever unintentionally found yourself on a date with someone who you have already been out with you know that you definitely need to go on a dating detox, or at the very least update your little black book with some new names.

Sex isn’t as fun

Sex is one of life’s great pleasures. At least, sex is one of life’s great pleasures if you don’t overindulge in meaningless sex. Having sex with lots of different partners can be good for some people, especially if you are trying to find out what you like and explore your sexuality. However, there comes a time in most people’s lives when one night stands and casual sex are not enough.

If you are suddenly finding that sex isn’t giving you the same satisfaction it once did, it might be time to reassess and go on a dating detox. Once you return to the world of dating perhaps you should try to hold back a little and not sleep with your date immediately. Studies have found that couples who wait to sleep with each other end up being happier in their relationship in the long term.

No butterflies

Although butterflies can get in the way of a date, feeling no nerves at all or being blasé about all of your dates won’t help either. If you don’t get nervous before a big date it shows you don’t care and chances are when you are actually on the date that lack of interest will show and will instantly turn off the guy or girl you are seeing. This means that even if this person is perfect for you, you will kill any spark or chemistry and yet again the date will end without the potential for more.

An easy solution is to cut back on the amount of dates you go on and if you find yourself regularly inundated with offers only agree to go on those that make you feel excited.

Haven’t found the one

Although love is hard to find, if you’ve been going on two or three dates every month for more than a year and haven’t found anyone you feel like you could have a future with it might be time for that dating detox. Going on too many dates means that you don’t give people enough time or focus and, in turn, this means you are not giving the relationship a chance to develop.

Try cutting back on the amount of dates you go on. Giving yourself this breathing space will mean that you have time to really get to know the other person and you may find that you see new qualities you might have missed had you moved on to yet another guy or girl.

Lost your life

Although dating can be fun it can take a serious amount of time out of your already busy life. To work out if you’ve been dating too much, look back on the last month and try to work out how many times you saw your friends, how many times you saw your family and whether you got to do anything you love, like swimming or going to the cinema. If your social life looks sparser than the Sahara Desert it’s a sign you need to reassess your dating diary.

Doing too much of one thing is tiring and dull, even if you enjoy going out with new guys or girls. Instead of over-dating, limit date nights to one or two a week. If you’re worried that cutting back on dating will mean you are less likely to find The One, don’t worry; researchers have actually found that dating any more than this could reduce your chances of finding a long-term partner.

Source: www.realbuzz.com

More from realbuzz: 5 reasons why your boyfriend is bad for your health











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