Belfast Telegraph

Cards from admirer drive my husband mad

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem.

I have been married for five years and for the past three I have received anonymous Valentine cards and, more worryingly, birthday cards.

Clearly it’s someone who knows me fairly well, as they know when my birthday is.

It annoys me a bit, but my husband gets really angry about it. He’s tried to get Royal Mail to find out who they’re from and he’s asked the postman to stop delivering them.

Unsurprisingly, he was told this wasn't possible.

Do you have any idea how I could get them to stop?

I’ve got another birthday coming up and I’m almost dreading it in case my husband blows his top again. LK

FIONA SAYS: TRY TO LAUGH IT OFF

What makes your husband so angry? Is it knowing that someone else finds you attractive?

In which case, he has a problem with jealousy that he needs to tackle because if he really believes you love him, what harm do they do?

Short of moving and not telling anyone, you probably can't stop the cards arriving until the person concerned chooses to stop sending them.

You could help this process by making it known to everyone that you don't welcome the cards.

That way, the sender might get to hear about it, understand that it is causing you a problem, and stop.

Can't your husband learn to accept that you have an unknown admirer and laugh it off?

You could try asking him how he would react if the cards were being addressed to him.

Would he not feel amused and perhaps a little flattered?

These cards don't seem to be threatening in any way and therefore can only worry you if you let them.

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