Belfast Telegraph

Husband's 'it can wait' attitude annoys me

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem.

My husband and I have been married for five years but I still can’t get him to understand that until I’ve finished the chores, I don’t have time to play around.

He's a real clown most of the time and I suppose it was one of the things I loved about him, but it can get annoying.

He says the chores will still be there when we get back, so I should go out for a drink with him — or something similar.

I find it really hard to cope with his ‘let-it-wait’ attitude and I never feel able to relax until everything is done. ES

FIONA SAYS: LEARN TO COMPROMISE

There's an incompatibility between your outlooks to life that is a lot more fundamental than when the chores get done.

This is something you really need to take a look at before it drives a wedge between the two of you.

You seem to lock yourself into a routine and he wants spontaneity and this is already starting to grate on you. The chances are that they may be grating on him, too.

The answer lies in talking to each other and learning to compromise. For example, household chores can completely dominate your time if you let them.

You need to learn to allow it to wait occasionally and he needs to learn to help share the load.

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