Belfast Telegraph

I owe it to my wife to admit that I had affair

Northern Ireland's number one agony aunt Fiona Hurley answers your problems

Dear Fiona, I’m a loving husband and I adore my wife and children but during my wife’s last pregnancy ten years ago I had an affair while my wife was going to and from the hospital.

My business was going badly at the time so I turned to my business partner’s wife.

We only slept with each other once as neither of us could stand the deceit.

I’m still wracked with guilt and want to come clean about this to my wife.

What should I do?

Guilt-Ridden Husband

Dear Guilt-Ridden Husband,

You're contemplating revealing this affair to clear your own conscience without considering the emotional fall-out.

This news will devastate other people and what good can come of your wife discovering this affair ten years later?

Failure is a difficult emotion to accept and high stress levels alongside a shattered ego can trigger cheating episodes in an attempt to regain lost feelings of self-worth and self-esteem.

Counselling will give you the opportunity to deal with all the guilt and self-hatred without risking your marriage.

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