I want his wife to know about affair then we’ll have a life together
Northern Ireland's number one agony aunt Fiona Hurley answers your problems
Dear Fiona, I’ve been seeing a married man for eight months and I’m his children’s childminder so I understand why he can’t leave them.
I am the first woman he’s ever wanted to be faithful to and our sex life is fantastic because I do things his other women refused to do. I just love him loving our sex life.
He says I’m a welcome relief from his wife’s saggy, post-baby body.
She thinks I’m her friend but sometimes I nearly reach out to hit her. I’ve almost told her all about us as there’d be no more lies and it would force them to finally split.
We could have a great future together so should I help her to find out?
Girl in Love
Dear Girl in Love,
Sex is unquestionably his driving force but your repertoire of tricks won’t captivate
him forever, and your body will change also so what happens then?
Despite his declarations of monogamy, he’s not faithful to you as he’s still being intimate with his wife. Unadulterated pride for ‘doing things his other women refused to do’ strongly indicates your low self-esteem and he’s capitalising on it.
Claiming to ‘ love him loving our sex life’ also reveals that sexual power’s motivating you, not real love.
Your feigned relationship with his wife, your lack of impulse control and failing to grasp the devastation disclosure would result in shows mental disturbances, the absence of conscience, and disassociation from reality.
You’re romanticising someone and something base, sleazy and the polar opposite of perfect.
You haven’t even contemplated the potential long-term damage to the children, his wife and yourself either. Wake up and stop fooling yourself that this can have a happy ending. End it now before innocent people get hurt.