Belfast Telegraph

Thursday 18 December 2014

I’m doubtful about my pregnancy

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem

My husband and I have been married for seven years and I’ve just found out I’m pregnant.

I’m 34 years old but I’ve never considered having children. This is completely unplanned — and I’m not sure I want it. My husband is thrilled but I’m panicking because I think I’ll be a useless mother.

Also, I have a great job and an active social life that I’m loath to give up. I’ve considered abortion but I am not sure it’s right for me – and my husband would be devastated.

I don’t know which way to turn. CB

FIONA SAYS: IT’S YOUR DECISION

This isn't an issue that anyone else can advise you on — you have to decide for yourself if you want to continue with your pregnancy.

Emergency contraception can be used up to five days after conception but, if you've already been tested, you're probably further along than that.

So, if you're pregnant and not going to have an abortion, then, if all proceeds normally, you are going to have a baby.

Most first-time mothers-to-be think they are going to struggle and they panic about how they will cope, but most manage fine.

As for a work and social life, you can combine these with having children – especially if your husband is willing to do his share, so talk about that now. But only you can decide if you want to have this child.

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