Belfast Telegraph

Wednesday 17 September 2014

Is marriage a mistake?

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem.

I’m due to marry my fiance in a couple of months, but I’m starting to worry I’ve made a big mistake.

We’ve been together for six years and I thought I knew him well, but recently he’s stressing me out over all the arrangements for the wedding.

He seems to be trying to take over everything and if he does something I don’t like, instead of speaking up, I clam up and fume internally.

It’s as if I’ve lost confidence in myself and in him. What do I do now? KH

FIONA SAYS: COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY

Pre-wedding nerves are so common that I’m not really surprised you are having worries.

It’s perfectly natural to have concerns about such a major step in your life, and, of course, you want to be sure you’re doing the right thing.

However, it does concern me that you cannot discuss your feelings with your fiance. If you can’t communicate now, then I have real concerns about your relationship in the future.

If you’ve managed to talk freely with him over the past six years, then you either need to start doing so again or else involve a counsellor and relearn how to do so.

It may seem early in your relationship, but I suggest you talk to Relate — if not face to face, then by phone or online. Visit the website relate.org.uk to find out more.

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