Belfast Telegraph

I’ve no idea why my fiance called off engagement

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem.

A few months ago I met a man who, like me, had recently been divorced. At the end of November, he suddenly suggested that we should get engaged.

I wasn’t sure as we had only known each other for such a short time, but he insisted he really loved me.

He told all his friends about us and even talked about going abroad to marry.

We bought a ring at the beginning of December — then, two weeks later, he called it all off.

He said he needs time, but I don’t understand what suddenly went so wrong.

He came with me to meet my parents and to tell them about our engagement, then he called to break it off. Since then, I’ve tried calling and emailing him but he will not reply. GS

FIONA SAYS: TRY TO MAKE CONTACT

How sad that something or someone has upset him so much he will not even talk about it. I assume you've talked to your parents to see if they spotted anything, or if something was said that may have caused this? If not, do try to do so — even if it's embarrassing for you.

Otherwise there is no way of knowing what went wrong until he is ready to tell you.

Call him again and leave a message letting him know that you don't understand what made him change his mind but that you would like to know.

Tell him you realise he may not be ready to talk at present but that, when he is, you really want to understand what went wrong for both your sakes.

It may take months, or it may be that you will never have an explanation, but that will be his loss.

If he is so lacking in courage that he cannot face telling you, then you could be better off without him

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