Belfast Telegraph

IVF ordeal turned my wife into a nightmare

Northern Ireland's number one agony aunt Fiona Hurley answers your problems

Dear Fiona, My wife has finally gotten pregnant after going through so many cycles of IVF that I’ve lost count, but she’s still not happy.

I’d secretly had enough after the third round but didn’t let on so she doesn’t know any different but why is she still not happy?

Confused Husband,

County Down

Dear Confused Husband,

Even if a woman becomes pregnant through IVF, stress levels often escalate as the stakes that have been invested in the baby are extremely high.

Should the woman suffer a miscarriage, she’ll have to go through the whole process again or accept a childless fate.

A breakdown in communication often occurs, especially if a couple become divided in their need for the treatment to work.

This frequently leads to extreme resentment so it’s possible your wife intuitively sensed you’d reached saturation point and harbours some resentment.

Reconnect with your wife and ask her what she’s feeling while reassuring her you’re supportive and as excited about it as she is.

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