Belfast Telegraph

Thursday 18 September 2014

My stepfather is too controlling

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem

My mother is a very sweet person, but she’s had very little education and can be a bit weak-willed.

Three years ago she married my stepfather, who has taken total control of her and manipulates her.

She never answers a question without looking at him first and although she left him for a while, she went back.

When she was away from him, she admitted to me that he is jealous of everyone and everything and he even tried to stop her from visiting me.

She still does so but pretends to him that she’s going shopping. I’m so fed up that I’m thinking of calling it a day and having little to do with them. I’m so sick of her husband running me and my family down and making sarcastic remarks. JA

FIONA SAYS: YOUR MUM NEEDS YOU

Please don’t desert your mother, because she really needs you.

Your stepfather’s levels of control are tantamount to abuse and if she’s as weak as you say, she’s very vulnerable.

You say she left him once and that, when she was away from him, she was able to talk to you. When she next visits, try to get her to open up again and tell you how she really feels about things.

Tell her that you are worried about the way he controls her life and that you’d like to think she had the freedom to do and to decide things for herself.

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