Belfast Telegraph

UK Website Of The Year

Pregnancy has ruined intimacy

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem

Published 16/08/2012

I've a wonderful husband and three lovely children, all of whom I love very much. But since the twins were born 18 months ago, I can't bear my husband to touch me.

If he tries anything, I end up in tears and I've gone to some extraordinary measures to avoid intimacy.

My husband is being very understanding, but I know this can't go on — he'll leave me for someone else more willing.

We used to have a wonderful time together and I really do love him, so what's wrong with me? RA


If your twins were only born 18 months ago, it's very possible that either the birth or the stress of looking after them is behind your feelings.

Perhaps the birth was difficult and intimacy is now painful, or you're terrified of becoming pregnant again, or even just overtired and this has triggered a depression.

But you are right to be concerned, because although you say you love your husband, he may start to doubt this if you avoid his advances indefinitely.

See your GP and tell him how you feel and allow your doctor to refer you, if necessary, for further help.

Belfast Telegraph

Your Comments

COMMENT RULES: Comments that are judged to be defamatory, abusive or in bad taste are not acceptable and contributors who consistently fall below certain criteria will be permanently blacklisted. The moderator will not enter into debate with individual contributors and the moderator’s decision is final. It is Belfast Telegraph policy to close comments on court cases, tribunals and active legal investigations. We may also close comments on articles which are being targeted for abuse. Problems with commenting?

Read More


From Belfast Telegraph