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Woman who had rapist's child says 'something amazing came from that horror'

Mother talks of her wonderful son - the child of a rapist

Published 19/05/2016

The woman said she had a happy life now.
The woman said she had a happy life now.

A woman has spoken about how she was glad she continued with her pregnancy after she was raped and how her son has transformed her life.

The woman was speaking on Stephen Nolan's BBC radio show.

She said at the age of 25 she was raped and continued on with the subsequent pregnancy as she had waited too long to have an abortion.

 

She said: "I did consider an abortion and before I had the confidence to ask, it was too late."

The woman said that after  the horror of the rape "something amazing" had come from it.

She told how she took to drink "for weeks and weeks" before seeking out an abortion.

The only person she told was her mum and that was when the child was five years old. He is now 15.

"It is constantly at the front of your mind when people ask about the child's father," she said.

"I have a beautiful son who changed my life for the best."

The woman said she had encountered the man who raped her, passing him in the street and that her son looked very like him.

She continued: "I look at my child now and I don't see that person at all.

"He has such good mannered person and I never think of his father

"I told my son the truth just last year - not that I was raped - but that there was something I need to discuss with him - but he will need to be older before I can tell him.

"He wanted to know the truth. I told him I had a hard time having him."

The woman said that the rape happened at the age of 25 and that working part time she could not afford to travel to England for an abortion, as many hundreds of women do each year.

More: 833 Northern Ireland women travelled to Britain for abortion in 2015, Department of Health report reveals

Abortion is against the law in Northern Ireland.

The maximum penalty for the crime of administering a drug to induce miscarriage under the relevant law in Northern Ireland, namely the Offences Against The Person Act 1861, is life imprisonment.

Unlike other parts of the UK, the 1967 Abortion Act does not extend to Northern Ireland.

There was outrage in April - from opposing groups who argued that criminal proceedings should never have been brought or that the sentencing was "unduly lenient" - of a Northern Ireland woman who took online-bought drugs to have an abortion.

"Women should have an option, it should be there for women," the mother said on the BBC.

"Why should a man be able to walk away after what he did and a woman live with the consequences. Women should not have to buy pills online. It needs to be done in a medical, professional way.

"Even to consider adoption, a woman has to carry a child for nine months.

"I did consider it - but I am glad I didn't go through with it.

"I have had a hard life but something amazing came from it."

The woman said that she did not report the rape to the police over embarrassment and fears she would not have been believed.

She has said she would consider confronting her rapist, and that he would be in no doubt about what he had done, but that she felt he was punishing himself for the attack.

"In his head he is being punished, I ask how could he live and be as happy as I am? He can't be as happy as me," she said.

"He stopped me from having more kids and ever marrying  - it just put me off.

"It is not hard for me because my life is good now.

"Out of this horror, something amazing came from it."

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