Close the book on Katie Price
It seems Katie Price has a new book out.
How do I know? Because the tabloids have been plastered with pictures of her holding copies of Sapphire — wot she rote wiv a ghost writer — while dressed charmingly in a spangly (fake) sapphire encrusted leotard.
This is no doubt destined to become THE number one best-seller in such high-brow literary establishments as Tesco and Asda, (although it is already half-price at Waterstones can’t think why) and will no doubt feature there for many months to come alongside the words and wisdom of other literary luminaries such as Coleen Rooney and Sharon Osbourne.
I for one hope never to have to read it simply because, well, she’s appalling, basically.
A quote from the brilliant American wit, Dorothy Parker, springs instantly to mind: “This is not a book one can put down lightly. It should be thrown with great force!”