Belfast Telegraph

Wednesday 30 July 2014

Men are smarter than women ... or that's what they tell me

So, according to a recent survey, women are officially cleverer than men.

What nonsense. It can't be true. In the last hour alone, I have personally been 'put right' on the following matters by a select sample of the truly wiser sex.

1. "No, we are not going to watch War Horse because it will only upset you. Rocky IV? Now there's a picture."

2. "Queens are the best potato in the world. You could live on them and them alone for the rest of your life."

3. "You should have turned left back there."

4. "That cat clearly prefers me. You can just tell."

5. "No, don't use those! You can't make tea with anything other than Barry's."

6 "Beckham's too old for football. No one wants to see him stripping off on the touchline."

7. "Have some chocolate, it's good for you."

8. "I'd have washed those dishes but you know you never like the way I do it."

9. "No, I tell you that's definitely Sandra Bullock's original nose in Demolition Man."

10. "Take it from me, George Clooney will never marry."

In fact, the males in my life are clearly among the most brilliant minds alive. That's just my lot, folks.

I'm sure the ladies among you will agree they are similarly blessed.

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