Belfast Telegraph

Finally, Sinitta takes her leaves

By Jane Graham

The world breathed a sigh of relief this week when Sinitta revealed that the love affair which has haunted us all for years – that "are-we-or-aren't-we, not being able to fully commit to each other and equally not being able to fully move on" thing she had with Simon Cowell – has finally ended now he's a dad.

It must have been tough enough for Cowell's new girlfriend, wondering everyday if Sinitta was going to pop round for dinner with only a couple of leaves covering her naked body, so she must be grateful that the ex has so kindly, publicly, released him.

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