Hi °C | Lo °C 
The tawdry spectacle that is Jordan's second divorce turned into pure pantomime this week when she and her ex Alex Reid (you know, the one she said she was afraid to be left alone with last week) booked into a luxury hotel for some pampering, heart-to-heart chat and a set of highly lucrative posed photographs.
But the really worrying Jordan - or Katie Price - news this week regarded details which leaked from the Peter Andre camp about what I would consider mentally unstable behaviour towards her daughter.
We already knew that Jordan eschews the more standard mother's approach of boosting a child's self-esteem by celebrating their natural charms - all that phoney wide-eyed ooh-ahhing 'Haven't you got beautiful eyes!' stuff isn't for her. Instead she likes to straighten Princess's hair and glue on false eyelashes.
But this week it was alleged that Andre also has photos of Princess having her hair DYED when she was one year-old and that the three year-old wears perfume and regularly sports fake tan.
Setting aside the health concerns of having these kind of chemicals on an infant's skin, just what is it about the normal human state that Jordan finds so unbearable?
She has transformed her own face and body and seems intent on passing her apparent dysmorphic disorder around her children - she has also dyed her five year-old son's hair for years.
She says now she's keen to withdraw her kids from the public eye - but what are the odds we'll even recognise them next time they get near a paparazzo's lens?
