Belfast Telegraph

What's Charlie Sheen got to say on women?

By Jane Graham

I've always had a soft spot for the highly articulate.

Which is why I fell for Russell Brand and don't hate George Galloway.

So I've watched Charlie Sheen's meltdown with interest - on one hand appalled that the Son of Martin should behave with such little foresight or wisdom, on the other impressed at the oratorical flow which seems to come naturally to him. He reminds me, ironically, of the babbling, but always compelling, drug casualty Dennis Hopper played in Apocalypse Now.

It doesn't surprise me that Charlie's best impromptu lines are to adorn a new range of T-shirts, but it does occur to me that none of his great speeches have addressed his penchant for girlfriends young enough to be his daughter.

Only Vladimir Nabokov was able to find poetry in this spiritually empty inclination, and even he had to create an illusion to do so.

Charlie's a bright guy - but when it comes to women, completely, depressingly, stoopid.

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