A pot of gold... on top of Charles Saatchi's fridge
What must it be like to be rich?
What must it be like to be rich?
Between now and Christmas he's expected to come up with the goods to keep everyone happy.
Estimates of attendance differ. But where Saturday's protest in Belfast city centre was concerned it would be safe to say that in recent times we've seen bigger, angrier crowds outside ASDA.
Last summer I don't remember a day when I didn't have the heating on for at least a couple of hours. From August, September onwards it was pretty much necessary several hours per day.
They have all the money in the world. They can afford all the "help" they could possibly need. But when stars collide, out comes the dirty linen in industrial quantities for public laundering. Charles and Diana... Jordan and Peter Andre... and now Charles Saatchi and Nigella Lawson.
We can't all be beautiful. We all accept that. But try convincing a young woman today, brought up with the dual pressure of the magazine air-brush on one hand and the vitriol of the the Twitter troll on the other.
The odd lightbulb moment may be the mark of genius – but not, apparently, the mark of the genius who designed Heathrow Terminal 5.
This week, the week that should be the busiest and best in Belfast's business calendar, is already book-ended by bullies.
Fifty years on, the conspiracy theorists continue to have a field day over the question of who killed JFK (above). According to one report, a shooting reconstruction expert (who knew there was such a thing?) has found that yes, Lee Harvey Oswald did it. And yes, he was on his own. According to the expert: "Oswald just got lucky that day ... and the President got unlucky."
Edwin Poots is against gay couples adopting because apparently, it is not "the natural order".
You don't like to kick a man when he's down. And John McCririck, formerly Channel 4's man at the 2.30 at Epsom is, by his own account, not just down but "desolate and inconsolable" after losing his age discrimination case against the station he'd worked with since its launch in 1984. Mr McCririck is 73.
"Let this be our secret ..." The words that Colin Howell used to Hazel Stewart after he and she had jointly murdered their respective spouses. It is a line so central to the story of their base, callous cover-up of that heinous...
The good news – a one tonne satellite did not cause any injury when it plummeted to earth this week. The bad news – there's tonnes more where that came from.
No less than 7,000 children sat the first part of the unofficial transfer examination which has replaced the 11-plus, scrapped by then Education Minister Caitriona Ruane (above) back in 2008. The number of pupils sitting the new unregulated test is actually a small but marked rise on the number who sat the first one back then.
It will come as no great surprise to anyone who has endured the soul-destroying bumper-to-bumper purgatory that is so-called rush hour in Belfast to learn that the city now rates at number one in the chart of most congested cities in the UK.
Did X Factor judge Nicole Scherzinger down a wee drink just before the weekend TV show? She strongly denies Twitter claims that she was tipsy. And she does appear to have what you would call an exuberant, outgoing personality.
Charity begins at home, they say. Maybe best kept there? I am all for giving. And, in most circumstances, collecting. What I object to is the emotional blackmail thing that makes every trip to the shops these days feel like a re-run of the Queen distributing alms on Maundy Thursday.
Marks & Spencer's Leading Ladies ad campaign is being blamed for the chain's failure to tempt the fashion buying hordes.
Do we need Banksy in Belfast? The celeb graffiti artist has recently been back in the headlines doing a bit of painting and decorating in and around the central New York area. He's made fans – the mayor of the city, unfortunately, not among them.
It will come as no surprise to anyone who does the grocery shop to learn that new research has raised hygiene concerns over our old friend the Bag For Life. Apparently in bacterial terms this should have a very short life. Especially if you put raw meat therein. Attempting to wash the thing only makes matters worse. So. On one hand we're told to avoid single use bags, on the other, that reuseable bags are dodgy. Meanwhile one agency urges us to eat all food before its use-by date while the say-no-to-waste lobby argues open it, smell it, take a chance. Clashing...