Belfast Telegraph

Sunday 20 April 2014

No thrills for real Bonds

Daniel Craig

Mi6 has launched a recruitment campaign to attract would-be apprentices to the espionage trade. In these things, timing is everything and it helps that right now the foremost spy in the business is all over the glamour circuit.

James Bond is back in the spotlight as his latest screen tussle with dark forces - Skyfall - hits the cinemas. It's got Daniel Craig and music by Adele. How could it fail?

Helpful in the promotional sense, too, is the endless media coverage including questions about the sheer scale of product placement. Bond has swapped his legendary Martini for a Heineken because the beer company is paying the film's makers a fortune.

Could be worse. Could have been WKD.

Then there's a story about how the family Middleton have been cashing in by selling items with a Bond theme on their Party Pieces website. The Broccoli family who own the Bond brand are unlikely to be impressed. Maybe Her Majesty (Royal in-law of the Middletons) could have a word with 007 next time he takes her skydiving.

Bond himself is currently played by the sultry Daniel Craig of the furrowed brow and pouty lips.

Why does Mr Craig smile so rarely? Like Posh Beckham, he seems to have sussed that the pouting glare is a look that works better for him. On those rare occasions where he is snapped smiling he doesn't look anywhere near so, well, Bondish.

Which brings us back to all those candidates for the MI6 vacancies, some of whom, despite an assurance in the job ad that it is work that "fits in well with family life", will still envisage the whole car-chasing, weapons-toting, high-octane excitement of the screen Bond's daily grind.

Imagine then, the double whammy of disappointment on discovering the day job is nowhere near as glamorous as grim-faced Daniel makes it look.

And then - not being able to tell anybody.

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