Belfast Telegraph

All these stories of beanpole celebs are wearing a bit thin

By Nuala McKeever

Did you hear about the man who thought he had lung cancer but it turned out he'd accidentally inhaled a pea and had a pea plant growing in his lungs? (Bet no-one could beat that online!) But it made me wonder...

I had a haircut the other day and as usual I used the time in the salon to browse as many celeb/fashion/trashy magazine pictures and captions as I could possibly manage before feeling queasy. (Could anyone actually stomach ten pages of Kerry Katona and her kids?) Anyway, along the way I learned that “people” are concerned that some female celebs are too thin.

I had a sudden image of a world inhabited by beanpoles, where an ‘And finally’ news item featured a beanpole who thought he had a strange illness that made his voice go weird, but then he discovered he just had Nadine Coyle growing out of him...

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