Belfast Telegraph

I’ll drink to a break from political pettiness

By Nuala McKeever

Things You Don't Miss About Northern Ireland When You're Away, Numbers 1-10 ...



1. The petty nature of our politics.

2-10. Same as 1.

For example, a man is ill in prison hospital. His partner and friends campaign for the prisoner to be treated outside. Eventually he's moved to an outside hospital. Politicians either praise or condemn this move. The split is entirely down sectarian lines.

One politician says the prisoner is fit to be cared for in jail, another, who's been in to see him, says he isn't.

Why on earth are these things in the realm of speculation? Either he is or he isn't. Surely it's a matter of fact, not one of debate.

Whether he's a republican or a loyalist has absolutely nothing to do with it.

I'm with the English toff who got on the plane out of here and said: “What a bloody awful country. Pour me a Scotch.”

Just make mine a double.

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