Your texts are driving me mad!
Never mind the strange recorded voice messages I was talking about a couple of weeks ago — now I've started getting unwanted texts from some Renault dealer.
If you're from SMC Renault and you're reading this — stop sending me text messages!
I don't want a car. I'm not buying a car. I have no money and no desire and if I did have both, I now wouldn't buy one from you because I don't know you, I've never done business with you and I don't like that you're using my mobile number.
I used to think Renault was stylish — it was all “Papa?” “Nicole?” and “I See You Baby, Shakin' That Ass”. Fun and a little risque.
But getting unsolicited texts feels like you're being flashed by a seedy creep in a dirty mac who knows where you live.
I'm sure you're lovely people, but please, put it away, will ya?