Been a bad week for Bieber. Jeremy of that ilk shot to fame because of his peculiar trousers.
But now these trousers lie metaphorically stranded at his ankles. It began when the alleged singer threw a tantrum at a posh Londonshire diner.
According to an article in Oxford University's Journal of Bieber Studies, the controversial Canadian wanted a family of normal persons removed from their table nearby so his security goons could have their seats. Management demurred and Jeremy waddled out in a strop.
Thus fame. Sounds like Jeremy needs one of those blokes who accompanied Roman emperors whispering periodic reminders in their ear: "You are not a god." It's the prerogative of gods not to be punctual. But Jeremy – is it Jeremy? Gerald? – took that too far when he was two hours late for his gig at London's O2 arena. Parents with children had to leave before he even appeared.
Back in Roman emperor mode, Gerald forked out £10,000 for a circus-themed birthday bash at London's Cirque Du Soir nightclub, only to be turned away because some of his entourage were underage. They ended up at McDonald's.
Gerald tweeted: "Worst birthday." Jeez, that's sad. Perhaps if he pulled his trousers up and got a proper job things would work out better for him.