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I will not brow down to this hair pressure

By Robert McNeill

Published 20/04/2012

When did people start mucking about with their eyebrows? And when I say "people" I'm not referring to men.

These days, you can hardly stravaig through a mall without tripping over a prostrate individual having her eyebrows mangled by operatives in white coats.

Until recently, I didn't realise folk did anything to their brows.

I'd a vague idea that burds often had neat ones and chaps bushy ones. I believed this was just as nature intended.

But now even my hair economist occasionally asks if I'd like my eyebrows interfered with, and I leap up from the chair shouting: "Unhand me, sir! These eyebrows are virginal and shall ever remain so!"

This week, I read that women can opt for various types of eyebrow: Natural, LA Arch, Audrey, Hippopotamus, Scouse or Skinny. Even the Natural isn't natural. They'll be telling us next we should be brushing our teeth, instead of leaving them yellow as nature intended.

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