Save the planet by chewing bugs? No chance
I regret to announce that I will not be eating insects, as advocated by do-gooders trying to save the smelly planet.
The idea is to get us to switch from eating so much big-animal meat, because rearing the appetising quadrupeds generates 20% of all greenhouse gases.
A top professor with a Belgian-sounding name ululated: “The world population will grow from six billion now to nine billion by 2050, and we know people are consuming more meat.
Twenty years ago, the average was 20kg. It is now 50kg, and will be 80kg in 20 years.” The leading worrier added: “If we continue like this we will need another Earth.”
Well, find one then. There's no way I'm eating grubs, grasshoppers or fat-bottomed ants (popular in Colombia). Cunning foodologists are trying to devise patties more acceptable to western sensitivities.
But these'll still be made of ground-up antennae, bug-eyes and fat bottoms. You have been warned.