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Strictly speaking, fish diet doesn't help me dance
Congratulations to Louis Smith for winning the final of television's Strictly Come Dancing show.
The king and I decree too much flesh is evil
We need to talk about Swaziland. The King of Swaziland and I have much in common. For a start, we both have facial hair, though his is a bit dodgy.
Filming Cate in this way was a nasty Hobbit
Of course I've seen The Hobbit. I'm a man of the world. But did this not entail visiting the cinema, a place I abhor? Yes, it did.
Has world ended for Chinese Mayan believers?
The Chinese don't muck about. There are too many people? Right, everybody can only have a maximum of one sprog or else they'll be imprisoned.
Let's stamp out this plan to treat our fine posties as second class
I hope you all gave a cheer for your postie on Monday. It was the first-ever national postal workers day, which sounds naff, but was designed to make the point that privatising the mail will be disastrous.
Don't spoil it for fans with any Law of the Rings
Tomorrow, at last, I get to see The Hobbit. For the past month, I've been geeking out on forums and dedicated websites. I've watched a dozen different trailers and have polished my 3D specs.
Why this feelgood movement on the internet really is site for sore eyes
It's not all nasty on the internet. On sites like eBay, I'm constantly surprised and delighted by the politeness, praise and all-round feelgood factor that's often to the fore.
Dolly showed a lot of pluck defying her old grandad
I was informed the other day that some women shave their legs all the time and others not at all. When I say "informed", I don't mean the intelligence was conveyed to me by a dispatch rider from the Government.
Did ancient man spend all day pottering about?
You can't beat a good crannog, and archaeologists appear to have discovered a doozy in a Fermanagh bog.
Why the long face Kylie, it's just gravity
Science news, and Kylie Minogue has been startled after encountering first-hand - or face - the effects of gravity.
Size does matter when it comes to text, just ask any e-male like me!
Let's talk about txts. Or texts, if you don't suffer from loose vowels. Texting celebrated its 20th birthday this week. And the first words of the first ever text? "Merry Christmas." Kinda sweet.
It's time to reflect on wardrobe boob, Tess
We need to talk about Tess Daly's cleavage. Well, we don't need to, but I believe it would be morally uplifting to do so.
How magic drink can help weight loss and stop GIs shooting at you!
At last, they've found it! Found what? You know. It. The elixir. Well, not the elixir. An elixir, at any rate.
Nothing beyond the reach of corporate greed
Can the capitalists not leave anything alone? Their crass behaviour constantly amazes.
In the name of all that's good, don't call your son Thor
Oh, it's a little baby boy. I think we'll call him Lager. He'll make a lovely sibling for his sister, Chlamydia. It's long been my contention that parents should not be allowed to name their own children but that the State should select these fairly and sensibly.
OMG, text speak just makes me want to LOL
Omg! Yet more trendy texty acronyms emerge.
How Justin's attire hits a new low
Bieber news, and the world's leading Justin has just gotten too small for his breeches.
What did Katy do next after she saw Russell?
Pity poor Katy Perry. Ooh, your mouth goes on tiptoes when you say that a couple of times.
If you want to look absolutely fabulous, just eat more lettuce
Food glorious food, vexed subject for bluster, while we're in the mood, cut back on the custard. Apologies for butchering the lines of the song from Oliver. But food is everywhere. We're drowning in the stuff. We swallow it, we fight it off, but still it assails us.
I'm smart enough not to hunt for my dinner!
Shock news: researchers say our intelligence is diminishing as we no longer need it to survive.
Radio One's Big Weekend
Three-day festival underway in Derry
Belfast Telegraph Runher 2013
Hundreds of women take part in 10k race
Review: The Hangover Part III
Comedy with big following means blockbuster
Cannes femmes: Shayk and Ambrosio on red carpet
Good guy Zach Galifianakis
Hangover star takes 87-year-old to premiere
FHM's sexiest women - Kunis knocks Tulisa off her perch
Latest News
IMF chief named key witness in case new
International Monetary Fund (IMF) chief Christine Lagarde has said a Paris court has named her as a key witness in an investigation into a controversial pay-off to an outspoken businessman arranged while she was France's finance minister.
Belfast Telegraph Runher 2013
Hundreds of women from across Northern Ireland have put on their running shoes for charity as part of the Belfast Telegraph's Runher 10k race.
Man arrested after drugs seized new
Gardai have seized 1.7 million euro worth of drugs from a house in Dublin.
Latest Sport
Clark fitness doubt for England new
Calum Clark is a doubt for England's tour of Uruguay and Argentina after an ankle injury ruled him out of Saturday's Aviva Premiership final.
England target top-two ranking new
Stuart Lancaster has been formally set the challenge of leading England into the 2015 Rugby World Cup as one of the two top-ranked nations on the planet.
Players accepting Mourinho return new
Chelsea's players appear to have grown used to the likelihood of Jose Mourinho returning return to the club.
Latest Showbiz
Robbie and Dizzee at Big Weekend new
Robbie Williams joined rapper Dizzee Rascal for a cameo rendition of Losing My Mind at Radio 1's Big Weekend in Londonderry, Northern Ireland.
Jaden Smith: I can ask dad anything new
Jaden Smith has described his famous dad Will Smith as a "walking dictionary" and says he can ask him anything.
Fresh Prince stars reunite at show
Will Smith was reunited with two of his Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air co-stars as his eldest son Trey made his DJing debut in London.
