Belfast Telegraph

Sunday 20 April 2014

Having a laugh, are you, Posh?

Victoria Beckham

I gotta tell you this: I'm not photogenic. All right, good call, I look like a muppet anyway. But it's not just the way you look. It's your expression. Because I dislike having my picture taken, fear and loathing of the event is usually evident in my eyelobes.

One of the bonniest lasses I ever knew was the same. Never came out right in pictures. So there is hope. Maybe the Native Americans had it right. The camera does something to your soul. Certainly, the results do.

I witter thus after seeing another picture of Mrs Victoria Beckham pouting grimly for the ruthless lens. Her facial pose has now become a major talking point in the pubs, churches and discotheques of the land. Can't manage a smile. Looks like she's just sucked a wasp off a thistle.

Now, as a newspaper columnist, it's in my job description to be flabbergasted. However, my flabberies were gasting like billy-oh when I read Victoria ululating thus: "It's important to laugh a lot, to enjoy your life."

Funnily enough, I'd never thought about that last bit. I must try it. However, what does she mean "laughing"? Her photos give the impression she has no experience of the phenomenon.

Or is it the case that the camera always lies?

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