Australia — a land created by the foresight of British imperialists many moons ago who knew that sporting insomniacs would need something to watch when pacing the living room in 2011.
With the Ashes safely tucked away, it’s now the turn of Andy Murray to keep us all glued to our sets in the early hours as our boy goes for glory. Loosely translated, the Beeb will cover it while that dour Scottish dreech is still there.
So it was at 4.00am he came on court to play against Carol Decker. At least I thought that’s what Andrew Cotter said, but it was late/early (delete as applicable) and it turns out it was Karol Beck.
Still the T’Pau flame-haired bombshell would have put up more of a fight, as Karol’s hands were grand but he turned out to have a shoulder made out of china and retired. These tennis players really need to show a little more heart and soul.
Beck has served a two-year ban for drug offences, Cotter saying he had tried to explain the levels of clenbuterol in his system because he’d used some of his mum’s painkillers and had his drink spiked in a Bratislavan nightclub.
He should have kept some of those painkillers to help his shoulder as he cried off after two sets in a trend that makes tennis’ early rounds a pain.
Murray was to play Illya Marchenko this morning, last seen in the Man From U.N.C.L.E. Hopefully he’ll put up more of a fight.