Belfast Telegraph

Saturday 27 December 2014

'Send me something very naughty...' Most scandalous sports quotes of 2009

LUST
"Send me something very naughty, go to the bathroom and take a picture." - Tiger Woods in a text to cocktail waitress Jaimee Grubbs
Tiger again, after deciding to take an "indefinite break" from golf after encounters with a fire hydrant, a tree and many more mistresses than he was comfortable mentioning" >
LUST
"I am deeply aware of the disappointment and hurt that my infidelity has caused to so many people, most of all my wife and children."
Tiger again, after deciding to take an "indefinite break" from golf after encounters with a fire hydrant, a tree and many more mistresses than he was comfortable mentioning
The Russian's agent, Dennis Lachter, playing hard to get, shortly before his client signed for Arsenal" >
LUST
"We know that Arsène Wenger likes the look of [Andrei] Arshavin. But I like the look of Angelina Jolie and it doesn't always mean you get what you want."
The Russian's agent, Dennis Lachter, playing hard to get, shortly before his client signed for Arsenal
Swannyg66, aka Graham Swann, twitters after England's exit from the Champions Trophy" >
LUST
"My worry now is paying off my hotel-room bill and keeping a straight face as the lady looks through the 'Channel 43 charges.'"
Swannyg66, aka Graham Swann, twitters after England's exit from the Champions Trophy
The Derby County captain Robbie Savage finds true love on the ice" >
LUST
"On the first Valentine's Day I spent with my wife, I made her watch the curling. 'Let's see one more rubber and we'll go out,' I told her. It was the only rubber I got involved in that night, I can tell you..."
The Derby County captain Robbie Savage finds true love on the ice
Andrew Flintoff reveals what really motivates him after getting out Ricky Ponting at The Oval" >
SLOTH
"If I had known you got a bottle of champagne for run-outs I would have practised more"
Andrew Flintoff reveals what really motivates him after getting out Ricky Ponting at The Oval
Usain Bolt puts a lot into breaking the 200m world record at the world championship in Berlin" >
SLOTH
"I thought it wouldn't hurt to try."
Usain Bolt puts a lot into breaking the 200m world record at the world championship in Berlin
Harry Redknapp on his brave subs during Spurs' visit to Bolton in January" >
SLOTH
"Two [substitutes] were asleep with hats pulled down and blankets over them. I said 'I'm sorry to drag you up here, I know it's cold and you could be home with the missus with a cup of tea. It's hard for 30 grand a week to watch the game.'"
Harry Redknapp on his brave subs during Spurs' visit to Bolton in January
A Eurosport commentator talking to Sean Kelly on the first Monday of the Tour de France" >
SLOTH
"The leaders have now got an enormous lead and the peloton, frankly, can't be arsed to catch them up."
A Eurosport commentator talking to Sean Kelly on the first Monday of the Tour de France
David Beckham
Tom Williams, the player at the centre of the "Bloodgate" scandal, on his discussions with Harlequins over compensation after he was banned for following team orders" >
GREED
"I would in all possibility be sitting out a season of rugby. After having discussed this with my girlfriend, I took the view that adequate compensation for all of this would be the club apologising to me, extending my contract terms and paying off the mortgage on the house I own with my girlfriend."
Tom Williams, the player at the centre of the "Bloodgate" scandal, on his discussions with Harlequins over compensation after he was banned for following team orders
Cristiano Ronaldo modestly reflects on his £80m move to Real Madrid" >
GREED
"The great players cost a lot of money, and if you want them you have to pay it. I'm happy to be the most expensive player in the world."
Cristiano Ronaldo modestly reflects on his £80m move to Real Madrid
Ronnie O'Sullivan after a mundane victory at the Masters in January" >
GREED
"I feel like I'm in a sport that has had its good days and is on a downward spiral. The game is dying and, unless something happens, I ain't going to these tournaments for £30,000."
Ronnie O'Sullivan after a mundane victory at the Masters in January
Tony Pulis admits defeat in his bid to bring Kaka to the Britannia" >
GREED
"We made an offer and it was turned down. We offered Stoke-on-Trent."
Tony Pulis admits defeat in his bid to bring Kaka to the Britannia
The England and Wales Cricket Board chairman Giles Clarke asked whether getting into a business relationship with Sir Allen Stanford could now be construed as a mistake after the billionaire's arrest in connection with a fraud investigation" >
GREED
"We had the best of intentions, so yes."
The England and Wales Cricket Board chairman Giles Clarke asked whether getting into a business relationship with Sir Allen Stanford could now be construed as a mistake after the billionaire's arrest in connection with a fraud investigation
Andrei Arshavin on why money buys success in football." >
GREED
"Arsène Wenger needs to buy new players - and expensive ones too. Why? Because all the talented and inexpensive players are already with us at Arsenal."
Andrei Arshavin on why money buys success in football.
The Bayern Munich general manager Uli Hoeness comments on Real Madrid's interest in Franck Ribéry" >
GREED
"There is the clear statement that we want to keep Franck in Munich. I wonder if Real's negotiator Pedro Jimenez knows the game Monopoly? Bayern played it two years ago and bought Park Lane, we have built four hotels on it. We will only let it go if we are broke or in an emergency."
The Bayern Munich general manager Uli Hoeness comments on Real Madrid's interest in Franck Ribéry
Ian Holloway criticises his Blackpool players after a 4-1 defeat at Crystal Palace" >
GREED
"If you're a burglar, it's no good poncing about outside somebody's house, looking good with your swag bag ready. Just get in there, burgle them and come out. I don't advocate that obviously, it's just an analogy."
Ian Holloway criticises his Blackpool players after a 4-1 defeat at Crystal Palace
Phil Taylor sets his targets for 2009 after winning the Players Championship" >
PRIDE
"I want to win everything this year. I am the new Nadal - and I am better looking than him."
Phil Taylor sets his targets for 2009 after winning the Players Championship
David Haye before his WBA world title fight against 7ft 2in Nikolai Valuev in November" >
PRIDE
"David only needed a slingshot and a stone to flatten Goliath, and I'm convinced my right hand generates more power than a stone."
David Haye before his WBA world title fight against 7ft 2in Nikolai Valuev in November
Jenson Button on the Brawn team radio after claiming the Formula One world title" >
PRIDE
"We are the champions my friends... Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo. We are world champions. World Champions. Woo."
Jenson Button on the Brawn team radio after claiming the Formula One world title
Phil Brown claims to have turned good Samaritan on a Hull City team walk across the Humber Bridge by using his "sweet talk" to save a suicidal woman from jumping" >
PRIDE
"We walked across there yesterday. We saved a girl actually - considering her future, shall we say."
Phil Brown claims to have turned good Samaritan on a Hull City team walk across the Humber Bridge by using his "sweet talk" to save a suicidal woman from jumping
England captain Andrew Strauss reflects on Ashes victory" >
PRIDE
"This is a special moment. At times I didn't think we were going to make it. That makes it more special."
England captain Andrew Strauss reflects on Ashes victory
Michaela Tabb on becoming the first woman to referee snooker's World Championship final" >
PRIDE
"I want to be in the Guinness Book of Records, yee-ha!"
Michaela Tabb on becoming the first woman to referee snooker's World Championship final
Manny Pacquiao recalls knocking out Ricky Hatton in the second round of their IBO light-welterweight bout in May" >
PRIDE
"I believe it was a very hard punch. My hand still hurts."
Manny Pacquiao recalls knocking out Ricky Hatton in the second round of their IBO light-welterweight bout in May
Serena Williams pays her own special tribute to Dinara Safina's arrival at the top of the rankings in May" >
PRIDE
"We all know who the real No 1 is. Quite frankly, I'm the best in the world."
Serena Williams pays her own special tribute to Dinara Safina's arrival at the top of the rankings in May
Cristiano Ronaldo after scoring against Porto" >
PRIDE
"It is the best I have scored. It was a fantastic strike and I can't wait to see it again on DVD."
Cristiano Ronaldo after scoring against Porto
Cristiano Ronaldo again..." >
PRIDE
"It's true lots of people hate me but there are even more who love me and who support me. I feel bad only when I play badly. Fortunately that happens rarely."
Cristiano Ronaldo again...
Mr Diouf after an alleged altercation with a white ball boy at Goodison Park" >
PRIDE
"Am I a racist? I am a desperado and a bad boy and whether in England, France or Senegal I sell papers. They try to find out things about me all the time. But I am mentally strong and they can't hurt me. I get booed wherever I go, but I have never let my fans down. I am the leader. El Hadji Diouf is a star whether you like it or not - everybody knows me."
Mr Diouf after an alleged altercation with a white ball boy at Goodison Park
Gazza's modesty shines through" >
PRIDE
"No one is ever going to be as good as I was."
Gazza's modesty shines through
Andre Agassi exposes, in his new autobiography, his experimentation with crystal meth in 1997" >
GLUTTONY
"Slim dumps a small pile of powder on the coffee table. He cuts it, snorts it. He cuts it again. I snort some. I ease back on the couch and consider the Rubicon I've just crossed."
Andre Agassi exposes, in his new autobiography, his experimentation with crystal meth in 1997
Gaizka Mendieta on life at Middlesbrough, his club from 2003-2008" >
GLUTTONY
"At Middlesbrough the beer used to flow in the dressing-room the moment matches were over. The following day the players were supposed to work on their recovery but instead they'd just have a coffee and then get back on the booze once more. They used to eat Mars bars and chocolates, and when I said something about it they'd fire back, claiming it was to give them energy."
Gaizka Mendieta on life at Middlesbrough, his club from 2003-2008
Mark Webber reckons Raikonnen was yearning for the bar, while he was actually blocking the Aussie during British GP Qualifying" >
GLUTTONY
"Kimi was, I don't know, drinking some vodka or dreaming or something."
Mark Webber reckons Raikonnen was yearning for the bar, while he was actually blocking the Aussie during British GP Qualifying
Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps after the publication of a picture apparently showing him smoking a bong" >
GLUTTONY
"I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner that people have come to expect from me. For this, I am sorry."
Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps after the publication of a picture apparently showing him smoking a bong
Fabio Capello lays down the culinary law to the England squad" >
GLUTTONY
"I have impressed upon them the advantages of a Mediterranean diet over ketchup and chips."
Fabio Capello lays down the culinary law to the England squad
Steven Taylor on Alan Shearer's ever-present aura during his time as Newcastle manager" >
GLUTTONY
"If I go into a restaurant I'm thinking 'He knows what I'm eating. Will I order chips or not?'"
Steven Taylor on Alan Shearer's ever-present aura during his time as Newcastle manager
The new BDO darts champion reveals to the TV presenter his iconoclastic lifestyle." >
GLUTTONY
Ted Hankey: "I've stopped drinking, so I feel healthier, look healthier and I am healthier. "Ray Stubbs: "So you're not going to the bar now, then?" Hankey: "No - I'm off outside for a cigarette!"
The new BDO darts champion reveals to the TV presenter his iconoclastic lifestyle.
Michael Vaughan looks back on his time in cricket as he tearfully retires" >
GLUTTONY
"I started at 16 in Yorkshire's second team and there was a can of lager at the table. Now it's smoothies, ice baths and Twenty20 cricket."
Michael Vaughan looks back on his time in cricket as he tearfully retires
England and Bath prop Matt Stevens admits to failing a drugs test" >
GLUTTONY
"It is a very serious substance and something over a period of time I have realised I have an issue with, something I think has basically ruined my life up until this point."
England and Bath prop Matt Stevens admits to failing a drugs test
Springboks coach Peter de Villiers responds to accusations of eye-gouging on the Lions tour" >
WRATH
"Why don't we all go to the nearest ballet shop, get some nice tutus and get some great dancing going on. No eye-gouging, no tackling, no nothing. Then enjoy."
Springboks coach Peter de Villiers responds to accusations of eye-gouging on the Lions tour
Sir Alex Ferguson unfairly lambastes referee Alan Wiley in October after Sunderland visited Old Trafford" >
WRATH
"We see referees from abroad are fit as butcher's dogs. He wasn't fit. He was taking 30 seconds to book a player. I think he's taking a rest, writing down the names on his card and taking 30 seconds for a booking; it's ridiculous."
Sir Alex Ferguson unfairly lambastes referee Alan Wiley in October after Sunderland visited Old Trafford
Sheffield United manager Kevin Blackwell appears averse to good news" >
WRATH
"If you said to me back in June when we returned for pre-season training that with three games to go we'd be in with a chance of automatic promotion, I'd have broken both your legs and your arms."
Sheffield United manager Kevin Blackwell appears averse to good news
Mike Tyson angry at suggestions he is going to be in Rocky VII as he toured the UK in November" >
WRATH
"Don't be facetious."
Mike Tyson angry at suggestions he is going to be in Rocky VII as he toured the UK in November
Jesper Parnevik referring to Elin Nordgren, Woods' wife, attacking his car with a golf club" >
WRATH
"I hope she uses a driver next time instead of a 3-iron."
Jesper Parnevik referring to Elin Nordgren, Woods' wife, attacking his car with a golf club
Usain Bolt plans a bit of advice for Cristiano Ronaldo" >
WRATH
"The first thing I'm going to tell him - stop acting like a wuss."
Usain Bolt plans a bit of advice for Cristiano Ronaldo
Diego Maradona enhances his relationship with the world press." >
WRATH
"They can suck it and carry on sucking it. This is for all Argentines, minus the journalists."
Diego Maradona enhances his relationship with the world press.
Serena Williams rant at a US Open line judge, which led to her exit from the tournament" >
WRATH
"If I could, I would take this f*****g ball and shove it down your f*****g throat."
Serena Williams rant at a US Open line judge, which led to her exit from the tournament
Fabio Capello takes Wayne Rooney to task following his red card at Fulham" >
WRATH
"What were you doing punching the corner flag? You're a crazy man, a crazy man."
Fabio Capello takes Wayne Rooney to task following his red card at Fulham
Roy Keane in unpatriotic mood after Ireland are knocked out of the World Cup to Henry's hand ball." >
WRATH
"They can complain all they want but France are going to the World Cup - get over it. France were there for the taking and Ireland didn't do it. Same old story. Ireland had their chances in the two games and they never took them. But it's the usual FAI reaction - 'we've been robbed, the honesty of the game...' It's rubbish."
Roy Keane in unpatriotic mood after Ireland are knocked out of the World Cup to Henry's hand ball.
Gymnast Beth Tweddle after winning World Championship gold in October" >
ENVY
"I've not had a phone call yet from the Prime Minister. Jenson Button got one, but I haven't. I'm clearly not important enough."
Gymnast Beth Tweddle after winning World Championship gold in October
Argentina manager Diego Maradona on the difficulty of reaching Lionel Messi" >
ENVY
"He's impossible to reach. It's easier to speak with Barack Obama than Leo."
Argentina manager Diego Maradona on the difficulty of reaching Lionel Messi
Sandy Lyle gets engaged in a war of words with Colin Montgomerie over the Ryder Cup captaincy in July" >
ENVY
"Colin is Colin. We do sometimes call him a bit of a drama queen."
Sandy Lyle gets engaged in a war of words with Colin Montgomerie over the Ryder Cup captaincy in July
Tour de France winner Alberto Contador reveals his apathy towards Astana team-mate Lance Armstrong" >
ENVY
"He is a great rider but it is another thing on a personal level, where I have never had great admiration for him and I never will."
Tour de France winner Alberto Contador reveals his apathy towards Astana team-mate Lance Armstrong
Matthew Hoggard hits out at Yorkshire after the county opt to release him in October" >
ENVY
"All I got after 15 years at the club was a cup of coffee in the chief executive's office."
Matthew Hoggard hits out at Yorkshire after the county opt to release him in October
Benitez is jealous of the Alex Ferguson's influence in January" >
ENVY
"Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone knows and cannot complain. That is simple."
Benitez is jealous of the Alex Ferguson's influence in January
Ireland defender Richard Dunne gets understandably green-eyed after Thierry Henry's handball in their World Cup play-off" >
ENVY
"Henry admitted afterwards he handled it, but it doesn't make me feel any better. We were cheated."
Ireland defender Richard Dunne gets understandably green-eyed after Thierry Henry's handball in their World Cup play-off

From Tiger’s text messages to Graeme Swann’s Twitterings, sport ticked off the seven deadly sins (and more) in 2009.

>> Click the image on the right to launch our guide.

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