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I’m afraid mum and dad won’t like my boyfriend

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Thursday Feb 23 2012

Over the years, I’ve had quite a lot of boyfriends and generally my parents have coped well. But I’m not sure how they are going to react to my latest boyfriend.

Apart from the fact that he’s nearly 16 years older than me, he’s got two children with his ex-wife and he’s got a criminal record.

He served six months for drug offences several years ago but he’s been straight ever since. I like him a lot, even when he teases me about coming from a “nice, cosy middle-class family”.

My parents are both very conservative and have despaired of their rebellious daughter at times.

But this isn’t rebellion. I really like this man and they know it, as they are pestering me to bring him home to meet them.

Things are getting more serious between the two of us so, sooner or later, they will have to meet. But I’m so scared that I will have to choose between them. TM

FIONA SAYS: INTRODUCE THEM — WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO LOSE?

You are scared that your parents will disapprove of your choice of boyfriend, and that your boyfriend will disapprove of your parents.

But you are forgetting one thing, and that is that they both love you.

You seem to be imagining all sorts of unpleasant clashes and horrendous rows.

But the likelihood is that even if they don't really get on, they will make an effort because they care for you.

Warn them that he is a lot older and is divorced. I don't think you need to mention his prison term; that's in his past.

After that, let things happen naturally — bring him in for a coffee to meet them the next time you plan to go out together. I am sure that, after the event, you will wonder what you were worried about.

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