How we're making Thanksgiving special in Northern Ireland
Today, people in the US celebrate the iconic holiday which dates back to the arrival of the Pilgrims from England in the 1600s. Claire O'Boyle asks three Americans living here how they're marking the day
Celebration: main, Maggie Burnside with husband Peter (both at right of photo), their daughter Penelope (centre) and other relatives and friends at their first Thanksgiving in Northern Ireland in 2014
Celebration: main, Maggie Burnside with husband Peter (both at right of photo), their daughter Penelope (centre) and other relatives and friends at their first Thanksgiving in Northern Ireland in 2014
Jennie Carlsten lives in south Belfast with husband Peter Jameson and their daughter Maddie, who is 10.
"I came to Northern Ireland for the first time in 1993 for a year abroad programme," explains Jennie, who grew up outside Washington DC.
"I loved it and after I left I was always looking for a reason to come back. I returned for summers after that, and I came back in the end in 2007 to do a PhD."
It was then she met Peter, who is originally from London, and the pair have been here ever since.
"I kept coming back, I like the accent, and everyone always thinks it's funny I didn't end up with some local boy," she says. "We ended up settled here, and having our daughter - so we've brought our traditions here."
Growing up as part of a family of seven, Jennie says Thanksgiving centred round a "chaotic big family meal".
"It was us to start off with, and as we grew up there were girlfriends and boyfriends, husbands, wives and children and lots of general strays," she says. "It was super traditional. We'd have the big turkey, the potatoes, and we have this thing my mom always called a salad - but it's most definitely not a salad.
"It's equal measures sour cream, bananas, mini marshmallows and mandarin oranges, all in a big bowl. I think we called it marshmallow salad, and whether it's a major tradition or a tradition of my family, I don't know it. But I still make it now."
Although, she admits, there's not always a huge rush on to get it.
"I think realistically I'm often the only one who eats that," she laughs. "The kids will sometimes try a bit, but it's mainly for my nostalgia."
Since moving to Northern Ireland permanently, Jennie, who lectures in media at Ulster University, has opened her doors most years to mark Thanksgiving in a traditional way.
Jennie Carlsten with her husband Peter and daughter Maddie
"It started out with just a couple of close friends," she says. "But that built naturally when people got spouses and children and, after starting as a sit-down meal, it's plates on the floor in the living room now.
"When I was a child we didn't really do the traditional thing of going round the table to say what we were thankful for, but we've introduced that now.
"A lot of our friends who come over are from different parts of the world, and along with our local spouses we're thankful for the fact we've found this family here, far away from home."
And while the traditional story of Thanksgiving and its sentiment is important to Jennie, she also hopes to educate her daughter about the more complicated origins of the holiday.
"The pilgrims had come to America seeking religious freedom and tolerance, and we know the story to be that they endured very difficult times and a tough winter," she says. "Many of them died, and the story goes that they were shown by their native friends how to plant corn and potatoes, and farm the land effectively. That's what we were all raised on, that and the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving specials.
"But it's like all those stories. You pull out the beautiful parts from the mix, while the historical reality might be quite different, and on the same day in the States is the Day of Mourning which highlights the plight of Native Americans.
"Speeches are running online this year and I'll probably watch some of them because while the traditions of Thanksgiving are great, and I love the nostalgia and the messages of gratitude and sharing, it's important to have a broader understanding of the whole thing, too."
'The holiday crosses every cultural background'
Mother-of-two Maggie Burnside grew up in Grand Ledge, Michigan and now lives in Comber with husband Peter and daughters Penelope (7) and four-year-old Harper.
"Peter and I lived in the States for five years together before moving back to Northern Ireland in 2013," says travel agent Maggie. "We'd lived in LA and our oldest daughter was born there. Peter moved first, and Penelope and I followed him over that December - so we had our last Thanksgiving in America."
Growing up, says Maggie (36), Thanksgiving was a huge deal for her family with parties of more than 20 people packing into her home to mark the occasion.
"My mom is a pretty good cook and she was known to host a really big Thanksgiving," says Maggie. "Because we grew up in Michigan, my brother would often be out deer hunting early that day and we'd spend hours cooking. We'd have a huge meal ready to go from around three in the afternoon, and after that it was football on TV. We were ready to hit the leftovers at the end of the day."
As well as the traditional turkey dinner and American football on TV, Maggie says Black Friday was a key part of her Thanksgiving ritual when she lived in the US.
"The day after Thanksgiving is Black Friday, when everybody is up for shopping," she says. "That's when things really start to kick off for Christmas. Unlike here, most people really do hold back until after Thanksgiving, and you'd spend time looking through the flyers from all the stores and plotting your shopping the next day."
Now living in Northern Ireland with civil servant Peter and her kids, Maggie has done her best to recreate the occasion.
"I've gone home a couple of times to be with my family there, but when we've been in Northern Ireland we've definitely marked it," she says.
"I'm raising the girls to appreciate that part of their culture, and under normal circumstances we would invite friends, neighbours and family over to mark it with us.
"The thing people have been most curious to try has been pumpkin pie - although I've realised that it might be more of an acquired taste than Americans think!
"This year, we'll have a scaled-back version with just the four of us because of Covid, but we'll still make our pies and deliver them round to granny and grandpa instead.
"When it comes to getting homesick, Thanksgiving is definitely a tougher time for me than Christmas, because you still feel like it's Christmas no matter where you are - but Thanksgiving is so strange because everyone else just carries on like it's just a normal day.
"The reason it means so much is that there's no religious overtone, and it crosses pretty much every cultural background because the message is such a positive one - to be thankful for what you have, and to have some time to spend with friends and family, slow down, and kick off that period towards Christmas."
'It was always so much fun, a chance to eat, drink and reconnect'
Amanda Davidson grew up in California and now lives in Lower Ballinderry, Co Antrim, with her husband Iain and their two children Stewart (12) and nine-year-old Isla. Amanda's eldest daughter Kayla (22) goes to university in the US.
"Iain and I met in the States, where Iain was working at the time," says Amanda (42).
"We were together for a long time there before a whole range of things, including the more positive work culture here as well as the better cost of university education and healthcare, inspired us to move in this direction."
And while the plan was to relocate to Iain's native Scotland, in the end a job in Northern Ireland brought the family here.
"We moved to Scotland in 2016, but a year later Iain's work brought us here," says stay-at-home Amanda, who works in admin for the group Ulster American Women's Club.
"The first year we didn't have lots of people over for Thanksgiving - mainly because we didn't know anyone. But we picked it up the year after that."
Amanda Davidson (second from left), husband Iain (second from right), children and her family visiting NI in 2017
Recalling celebrations of the holiday throughout her childhood, Amanda says her family would often play host, often welcoming more than 20 people to her home. "I'm from a big extended family, so it was always a big deal," she says. "It would start around 2pm and if the 49ers were playing, we'd all watch the American football.
"My dad is from the Philippines so we'd have absolutely tonnes of food, the traditional Thanksgiving fare as well as Filipino dishes. It was loads of fun, always, a chance to eat, drink and reconnect."
Moving to Northern Ireland, admits Amanda, she's missed that tradition.
"In 2018 we managed to have three couples over with their kids, and I really loved it," she says.
"I love hosting and throwing parties, and it really felt like a way to have that sense of opening the doors up for people.
"The last couple of years I've cooked the whole thing, the turkey and stuffing, mash potato, apple pie, pumpkin bread.
"It's amazing - although it's hard to find canned pumpkin here!"
As well as marking Thanksgiving over the past few years, Amanda has got together with other Americans living in Northern Ireland to celebrate the Fourth of July.
"Last year we had about 70 or 75 people join us for a BBQ at our place, which was really fun," she says. "It was great, and while we missed it this year of course, and Thanksgiving this year will be very pared down with just the four of us, we're hopeful that we'll be able to something amazing organised again in 2021.
"Thanksgiving will be different, of course, but the main thing is being grateful for what we've got - and the food of course!"
