Belfast Telegraph

Dad doesn't trust me

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem.

My boyfriend and I have been together for nearly two years. We’re both 16 and we love each other very much and spend a lot of time together.

The problem is my dad who treats me like a 12-year-old and refuses to let us spend any time together when we are under his roof.

We can’t even sit in my room and listen to music — we have to stay in the lounge with other people around.

Whenever I go out to meet him, my dad is always nagging me to be careful.

It’s so different at my boyfriend’s house, where his parents are very easygoing and let us spend lots of time alone together.

We could have had sex dozens of times but we haven't because we don't feel ready yet. How can I get my dad to trust me? LW


I'm afraid there's little chance of your father ever treating you the way your boyfriend's parents treat you and their son.

They have different values — and all these will affect they way they bring up their children.

Add to which, most fathers act far more protectively towards their daughters than they do towards their sons.

I'm not saying this is right or wrong, it's just the way things are.

Your father would see his attitude as caring rather than restrictive.

If you could start to understand that, then you would begin to understand him and his behaviour.

You are asking him to treat you like an adult, so start thinking like one and don't make comparisons between parents.

Instead, show your dad you understand his worries, then show him you can be trusted. If you can do so without making a fuss, he is, given time, more likely to relax them.

Belfast Telegraph


From Belfast Telegraph