Belfast Telegraph

I can't find the right words

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem.

My cousin’s wife is going into hospital for a mastectomy and I would like to write her a letter of encouragement and support.

The trouble is that I am having real difficulty in putting it together.

I would be grateful if you could draft one for me that I could then adapt to suit what I want to say. ED

FIONA SAYS: WRITE FROM YOUR HEART

Anything that I wrote for you would be impersonal and would come without any knowledge of the woman concerned or her background.

If I ever have to write a difficult letter — when someone is very ill for example or when someone dies — I always think of something personal about them.

I then think of why I want to write the letter at all.

If it's out of a sense of duty then my letter will probably be quite formal, but if it's someone I care about, I try to make sure this comes across.

If I am shocked or upset, I try to put that down too. In other words, write from your heart.

Your concern for your cousin's wife does you credit — nothing I can say will make that feeling come across as well as if you write it yourself.

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