Belfast Telegraph

I get so upset by these comments about my height

Fiona Caine is here to help if you have a relationship, sexual, marriage or family problem.

I’m 33 years old but treated like a child because of my height — I’m only 4ft 11in.

Ever since I can remember, people have tried to make jokes about how small I am. Originally, I hoped it would improve once I left school, but that made no difference.

I do try to hold my tongue but when people put me down or belittle me, I snap at them and so have an undeserved reputation at work for being prickly.

I know I’m efficient, capable and good at my job but I am constantly passed over in favour of other people and it’s so unfair.

If only people would realise how hurtful they are being. AG

FIONA SAYS: CONFRONT THE SITUATION WITHOUT TENSION

Plenty of short people have made a success of their lives. For example, Kylie Minogue’s short stature has been no barrier to her phenomenal success.

If you are being passed over for promotion, I fear it may have more to do with your perceived prickly nature than your abilities.

Most of the comments you get are probably the result of thoughtlessness or attempts at humour rather than malice, so try to think of them in this light.

You've already realised than giving aggression back will only make matters worse, so why not try another approach?

The next time it happens, calmly say something such as, ‘It's unfair to tease me about something I can't change', then smile and walk away.

The main thing is to try to defuse any anger or tension you may feel, as well as make the other person see that, however unintentionally, they are hurting you.

Once you feel you can control yourself if remarks are made about you, talk to your manager about promotion and ask what opportunities might be available

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