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Kerri McLean

The painting disaster in daughter's bedroom that proved I really am the Frank Spencer of DIY

Kerry McLean


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Frank Spencer

Frank Spencer

Frank Spencer

I really need things to go back to normal while I still have a house to call my home. The problem is, with spending far more hours at home than I normally would do over the last few months, I not only have the time to notice more flaws and problems, I also have had the time to watch instructional videos on the internet and fool myself into thinking I can carry out all manner of decorations and repairs by myself.

I recognise the symptoms because I've been here before though in less unusual times and circumstances, back in the late 90s when I'd bought my first little flat, and boy do I mean little when, having watched a ridiculous amount of the TV series, Changing Rooms, I decided that I could change my pokey studio flat into a spacious apartment with nothing more than a few brightly coloured paints, some attractive trinkets from my local charity shop and more floating shelves than I had walls to put them on.

Inspired by the programmes designers, Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen and Anna Ryder Richardson, both of whom repeated the mantra that white was boring and we should embrace colour, I painted each wall and indeed the ceiling in a different hue. The result was, as you can imagine, a rainbow coloured, migraine-inducing disaster and, having very little spare cash, I had to wait several months before being able to afford to bring in a professional painter to return my surfaces to a nice, bright white. Though, in certain light, I could still see that bright pink shining through, mocking me...