A Belfast man whose 11-year-old son took his own life nine months ago has written a powerful play about his suicide.
The heartbroken dad has also called for more help from the government to tackle the "epidemic" of similar tragedies, especially among young people in Northern Ireland.
Michael Draine's son Cillian, who was a talented boxer, was found dead in his north Belfast home only hours after telling his father: "I love you, dad" at the end of a New Year's Day outing.
Michael who was woken the next day with a phone call about the shocking news of his son's death says: "I'm glad I have his words from our trip to hold on to. And I told him I loved him too."
On World Suicide Prevention Day this week Michael had a harrowing film of his play, "The Good Room" posted on YouTube with north Belfast actress Bernadette Brown delivering the emotion-charged monologue.
Her character is seen talking to a picture of President John F Kennedy trying to come to terms with the death of her father during lockdown and the soaring suicide rate in north Belfast.
The film concludes with a picture of Cillian and a message that says 'our children are dying' followed by a plaintiff one word plea: 'Help'.
Michael's 40-minute, play which he filmed on his iPhone during lockdown, also tackles the mental health crisis created by the coronavirus.
Looking back on his son's passing, Michael says there are still many unanswered questions about why he took his own life.
He adds: "I know we will probably never know why he did what he did. He seemed to have had a great Christmas. He was in really good form when I took him and his friend out for a drive on New Year's Day.
"I was amazed and proud as I listened to Cillian giving his friend level-headed advice on family and school matters."
Michael says his son was always on the go, adding: "He was like that cartoon character Taz the Tasmanian. He was a bundle of energy."
Cillian's actress mother Mary, who had watched TV with him in the evening, found his body the next morning in his bedroom at Salisbury Avenue.
Michael's film has been posted on the website of Belfast's MAC arts centre, whose creative director Simon Magill lost his own son Lawrence McKavanagh half an hour before his 27th birthday six years ago to what his father describes as "associated mental health issues".
"I reached out to Simon after Cillian's death," says Michael. "I needed to talk to someone for advice and he very graciously helped me."
Four years ago Michael staged a very different version of The Good Room at the Feile in Belfast.
It was a critically acclaimed one-woman show starring actress Julie Maxwell who sadly died suddenly a year ago on a night out with her husband.
After Cillian's passing Michael decided to reprise the idea of a play set in the "good room" of a house.
He says: "With the onset of the coronavirus I decided to set the new version of the play in a house during lockdown" says Michael. "I had some of Cillian's ashes with me and I thought if I'd planted a tree at Roselawn and wanted to scatter them there, I would have been going crazy if the cemetery had been closed to me because of the pandemic.
"The writing and the re-writing of the drafts didn't come easily. But on what would have been Cillian's 12th birthday on July 1 - six months after I last saw him - I gave myself an eight-week deadline to finish the play.
"That's all I could think about. I wrote day and night and tried to figure things out.
"A lot of people said many different things about Cillian's death and how he would be looking down on me but I became almost obsessed about what would happen to his soul.
"I tried to find out how different faiths dealt with death and that's all in the play. I explored a number of ways of presenting the piece and eventually decided the film format would work best."
By another twist of fate one of the initial rehearsals with Bernadette after the easing of lockdown was held in the very same place in north Belfast where the first meeting of a suicide awareness charity was organised 20-odd years ago.
Michael says he doesn't believe bereaved parents can ever really cope with the deaths of their children.
He adds: "You just try to get on with life. There's no destination point. It's not like running the marathon and thinking that you've reached point 'A' and all you have to do is get to 'B'. It's an ongoing process and something that is always going to be there.
"They say that grief comes in waves and maybe the waves just get less and you just get more used to the person not being there.
That's the initial shock and it leaves a vacuum. I can be having a relatively good day and I will turn around and see kids of Cillian's age on their bikes or just messing around and it hits me like a sledgehammer."
Michael says Cillian had never lost any close friends to suicide but he adds: "I understand that the uncle of one of his friends had taken his own life a few weeks earlier and Cillian was really shocked by it."
Michael who worked in theatre for years as a technical manager before turning to writing plays is worried that the Covid-19 pandemic is having an as yet unquantified impact on mental health.
He says: "Even before Covid-19 it was estimated that as many as six or seven people were dying here by suicide every week. But we won't know the statistics in this year of crisis until 2021.
"Yet we really do need to talk about the numbers. We have to know and we must see the Executive adopting a pro-active strategy to deal with suicides.
"I would imagine there will be a tsunami of a mental health crisis if there's a second lockdown. Everyone's mental health has already been affected by the first lockdown."
Michael is hoping that one day in the not too distant future The Good Room will be staged 'live' in a theatre.
The Good Room, written and directed by Michael Draine is available to view on YouTube and on the Facebook page of the MAC in Belfast.
If you are affected by any of the issues raised in this article, contact the Samaritans on 116 123, or Lifeline 0808 808 8000